Imagine visiting someone and you have to spend a night, only to be shown your bedroom and when you enter the bed, you realise that the bedsheets are cold and dirty.
Such scenarios happen when your host or their relatives have been using the same bed and are not kind enough to change the bedsheets, but decide to make the bed properly to cover the fact that the bed sheets are dirty. Sometimes it’s even just out of laziness that they may not have the energy to wash them, especially if you’re just spending one night.
When such a thing happens, a visitor feels uncomfortable to even ask for a pair of clean bedsheets for fear of being misunderstood. That paints a picture that either your hosts are not valuing you or that you are not welcome.
This and more hinders people from visiting or sleeping over. Have you ever visited someone planning to spend some days away from your home, but change your mind because of your hosts’ behaviors? This happens and if someone isn’t careful, they may chase away friends and relatives indirectly. What could nag you and hinder you from visiting people?
Joseline Uwamahoro, a fashion designer explains that although you don’t expect to have the best stay as if it is your home, some things are not worth standing, and some of these are; serving visitors food mixed up with sauce on one plate without giving them a chance to self-serve.
For her, this is a sign of disrespect, as people need to be requested if they are comfortable serving them or if they prefer self-service.
She also notes that another ill habit is ungroomed kids who jump on visitors deliberately, grab their phones to play games, and shout on purpose just for attention that avert the host to converse comfortably with the visitor.
Uwamahoro states that children should be raised with morals and must know how to behave around visitors.
Bosco Muhire, an educationist and a father of three says that visitors deserve privacy, "if you give them a room to sleep, it’s just kind enough to knock before you enter their room. Don’t just open the door, they could be dressing up, or sleeping or just want some alone time before they come to the sitting room.”
He adds that some people dress so indecently just because they’re in their house. There is no problem if you’re alone at home or with your partner, but if a visitor is around, try to be decent for the time they are around so that you don’t make them uncomfortable.
He also stresses that though people think they have a right to be, act or dress the way they wish at their home, it's polite to mind about the comfortability of others.
Muhire further explains that if you’re busy, don’t let in visitors because they would require time.
He highlights that having a visitor and not being able to have enough time with them seems rude. If you’re buried in work, he urges the host to ask for help from their house manager or postpone the visit.
The educationist carries on that there is nothing as irritating as a host who consecutively speaks on phone in your presence. Or even excuses him or herself for longer phone calls.
He adds that being unhygienic is also not good, where the host spends the day just like the way they left bed and comfortably interacts with a visitor without brushing their teeth or showering.
Muhire adds that untidy hosts also make visiting tough and unpleasant. "Such people are messy and dirty and the moment you enter their house, a stench welcomes you. The house could be smelling children’s urine, and their chairs stained, or wet that you even struggle to find a place to sit. Their houses could have kids’ toys thrown in every corner of the house, and when you decide to use their toilets or washrooms, they are usually dirty yet they have water and soap that could make the place clean. You can easily catch disease from such an environment,” he states.