The Counsellor's thoughts...

Your question cuts across multiple issues that require careful consideration and shrewd technique in handling them.

Dear Brenda

Your question cuts across multiple issues that require careful consideration and shrewd technique in handling them. First of all, before making any major career decisions to leave a job, there is need to think cautiously and avoid cases of stagnation and dilemma when disappointments begin to surface. You tested the burden of this experience when you abruptly left your earlier job and now you wish to get back to it. I wouldn’t advise you to do so because chances are; your position must have been filled and you may turn out the laughing stock of your former boss and other employees.

Jumping from job to job can give the impression that you’re not reliable or dependable and this can affect your seniority and stability at one job. However, regardless of these benefits, it is nearly impossible to be subjected to derogatory treatment under an arrogant boss whether physically or psychologically. Your decision to quit the former job was justified but now your father, who is your boss at the new job, does not want to pay you. This is absolutely erroneous and you need to take extreme steps to amicably strike consensus with your father about this issue.

You don’t deserve to stay in a position that doesn’t pay you for your work. Sit down with him and express your feelings about this issue. If possible, demand for a contract between you and the company that clearly streamlines the employer-employee relationship, plus the obligations of each party so that when at work, you’re treated as an employee and not a daughter.

Make yourself clear first and make a proper roadmap of how you are going to pursue your interest and how you deserve fair pay. Be as objective as possible but humble when discussing this issue with your father and he might understand. Involve your mother when you get home so she can help explain your concerns to your father.

If he still doesn’t understand, and if you aren’t in a situation to take calculated risks, then find your area of interest and look for another job. The best financial security today is to have great job hunting skills. Find a good job, do it until you find another great one.

This is your life and you have to know what to do with it. No one, not even your dad, should keep you in a situation that makes you miserable.

Alternatively, if you want to initiate your own business with that capital of Rwf 1,200,000, you have to consider certain factors before starting. These may range from the market demand, your expertise and passion, location and legality of the business.  Small businesses like consultancy services, proofreading, beauty salons, interior design, business plan services, cyber cafe/business centres or special events/party organising, can fit well in your undersized capital. The bottom line is to do whatever it takes to work but don’t ruin the relationship with your father. I wish you all the best.


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