I started off this year with modest aspirations but determined to achieve them all the same. I really want to do better and be a better person in general, but it’s doesn’t look like I’m making a lot of progress. I know it’s only March and I still have plenty of time to get my life together but I’m starting to get a little worried. For instance, I’m getting worse at timekeeping; well knowing that time is money. This week alone, I’ve been late for three appointments and while those I was meeting were acquaintances, I could tell they weren’t too happy and I just don’t want to become that girl who never makes it anywhere on time. The funny thing is that I will plan ahead and start getting ready in good time. There are times I even put off things like lunch just so I’m not late and then at the very last minute, I get distracted by the silliest of things. Like the time I noticed my wall clock had stopped working (yes I still have a wall clock) and instead of leaving it until after work since I have a million other ways to tell the time, I instead went ahead and tried to find some batteries around the house. Didn’t find any and unfortunately, I had wasted a good 15 minutes. I also have a habit of double-checking things a million times over even when deep down I know I already unplugged all the appliances and switched off all the lights, I’ll still do one last check! Poor timekeeping aside, I’m not doing well with my spending either. I’ve always prided myself in being steadfast and not one of those people who do or buy things just because so and so has or did the same and yet these days when I go places or visit friends, I find myself wondering where they got the beautiful rug or giant flat screen. A couple of times, I was even bold enough to ask and then I get home and all I can think about is the nice couch I just sat on or some other material things. This is worrying, especially because most of them are ridiculously expensive and secondly, I don’t need all of them. Okay that’s a lie. I need nice things too but at the right time. I may have to stop visiting until I regain my sanity! The other thing I fear might get in the way of achieving my goals this year is my waning go-getter attitude. Sometimes it feels like all the hard work is in vain. I’ve met people in their 60s and 70s still working their butts off and to be honest, I don’t want to be hustling at that age. Obviously I don’t know their stories or priorities but even though we’re often reminded to never stop chasing our dreams, I believe that if you haven’t made it by the time you’re 60 or so, chances are you probably won’t. I could be wrong, especially because there are many success stories of people who found fame and fortune in their later years but I just don’t think the same would apply to me.
