Women say they will always know! It does not matter whether you did it at the ends of the Earth or in a nameless motel in the opposite side of town.
Unfortunately for the philandering husbands, their wives are always right. Or, well, almost right most of the times.
They are always armed with the knowledge of what you did, even though they may lack the evidence.
Unfortunately, again for men, the opposite does not work exactly the same. The truth is that it is men who have the most opportunities for cheating on their wives but science has proved that they are clueless in this game. Discoveries have been made that scientific composition has again conspired to make sure that men cannot have their cake and eat it.
Faith, a journalist in Kigali, says that she needs only a look at her husband in the evening to know that he had been playing mischief on their wedding vows during the day.
“My husband is a gifted actor but I always see deeper than that. I can tell with certainty what exactly he has been doing, especially if he has been on a trip. I don’t have to guess. I just know and my judgment is almost always true,” she says. Faith says that she can even tell when someone is lying that her husband is cheating on her.
In this game, she says, she does not need confirmation from anyone. “I can only ask for confirmation when I need material evidence that he is into mischief. Other times I will work it out by myself without even leaving the house.”
Faith is not alone. Many women say that they will always tell when something is afoot in their marriage, especially on matters to do with infidelity. Their helper is intuition. Just, old, proven and reliable intuition! But does intuition work? And why don’t men claim the powers of intuition if it is a common human trait?
Chantal, an IT consultant says that she can tell when her boyfriend is on to something from afar. It does not matter how well the man covers up his ‘sins’ she always has the final word. She reveals: “Sometimes he will just make a call and everything falls into place. I don’t have to meet him to know that he is engaging in infidelity.”
Thierry Kalimba, a lecturer of sociology, says that men can only ignore the power of intuition at their own peril.
He says: “Intuition is a metaphysical phenomenon, a form of spiritual knowledge where one is able to communicate with the invisible. Some Christians do not believe in it because the scriptures are not very clear on this.”
But while we cannot deny that intuition works for real, it can sometimes fail you. For instance, a lady meets a man and says she had an intuition about it and knows this is the man of her dreams. She may end up having a baby with the man without thinking about other important ingredients of a marriage and end up regretting it later.
Michael, a marketer, thinks the whole thing about knowing things that you cannot provide evidence for is crazy. He poses: “This is pure superstition. How can one know something without some evidence being communicated to her, or at least some signs that it is really happening?”
He claims that one of the surest way into wrecking a relationship is through following “these things blindly”.
He adds: “Just because some scientists have discovered the relationship between nature and women’s perceptions, does not mean that we throw all intelligence to the air and start accusing each other just because we feel like it.”
But Kalimba says that intuition is for real, and that there are pretty conclusive fundamentals backing the phenomenon. Intuition, he adds, is sometimes called the sixth sense.
He explains: “The strength of the sixth sense is much higher in women than in men because women are closer to nature than men. This explains why women succeed in it while most men just dismiss the phenomenon because they are not well disposed to experience it.”
The lecturer says that there are several metaphysical experiences that are only peculiar to women. For instance, women who are breastfeeding will always tell when the child she left at home is feeling unwell. This is an experience that never occurs to men no matter how close they are to the child.
But intuition almost always affects the relationship negatively. Where a man does not know what is happening, the marriage continues just blissfully.
In the case that a woman knows what is happening but she does not have hard facts, disturbing feelings follow, which can degenerate even lower into depression or other feelings of abandonment. Confrontation is always inevitable.
One of the reasons men are prone to dismissing the power of intuition out of hand is because men are not emotional when we come to relationships. Owing to the fact that most metaphysical experiences demand emotional energy, women tend to perform better in this realm than their partners.
Those who cannot summon these emotional energies always dismiss the phenomenon out of hand.
But what happens when someone errs? Like all metaphysical experiences, caution is required when dealing with intuition. Being a psychological feeling, you may never be able to find concrete evidence for it and your only hope, lies on how the partner responds to your concerns.
But the good news for women is that you can use intuition as your guide to hiring a private detective on his case.
Kalimba explains that the reason many men deny even when they are caught red-handed in their escapades is because their intuitive power is low. He says: “Men do not expect to be caught.
Indeed, they engage in promiscuity because they think they cannot be caught. When it happens, they become dumb and can exhibit tendencies of denial that borders on stupidity.”
It is, however, official: Intuition is for real. So next time you are caught on the wrong side, think twice before mumbling the old and tired excuse — “it wasn’t me.”