THE VILLAGER: “At Mama Colonel”

Last time, I was in a hurry preparing to compensate for the absurd stay at the so called “Merry Christmas” Hotel.  

Last time, I was in a hurry preparing to compensate for the absurd stay at the so called “Merry Christmas” Hotel.  

This time round, I feel much better, more so, having found myself a place that I could call a home away from home.

Having settled in, I was in a hurry to catch up with this city (Kin Malebo), as earlier on arranged, my new found friend MM (Mwana Mbeto) was more than prompt in arriving at our hotel.  

Do not get me wrong, this guy is nothing of a “detoother” but a good Congolese.  He has volunteered to take us round his city, show us the good “watering holes”, where to eat decently (I am not yet ready to consume any of my relatives – apes and monkeys).

In contrast, Kinshasa lays on a relatively flat plane, a phenomenon differentiating it from either Kigali or Kampala; it has some semblance to Dar-es-salaam (only in terrain).

Just near the Hostel Bethanie, there are lots of open air pubs.  Going by the cost of food stuffs here, the cheapest forms of food are bread and beer.  

Many a people can be found “drinking” their lunch!  Where a plate of beef and chips goes for US dollars fifteen and the same can buy up to five huge bottles of SKOL, only a “fool” would feed otherwise.

Cutting the long story short, as the saying goes,  “where in Rome, do as the Romans”!  As we were planning to go out and have a good dinner, we decided that, in that case, none of us was going to eat on empty stomachs.

No other better way than lining our hungry tummies with a few bottles of the cold SKOLs!  Ya ra ra ra ra, akana katazerera kagira ngo, nyina niwe uteka neza  (my goodness, a child that does not roam about thinks that the mum is the best cook!  

Please, you guys at BRALIRWA, I’m not taking this personally but the truth is, these guys (BRALIMA) are doing a good job!  


The SKOL tastes incredibly superb.

There cannot be a better way of preparing one’s tummy than loading it with a few cold SKOLs.

As the sun was “falling” into the mighty Congo River (that is how it looks), we decided to go and prepare ourselves for what was to “befall”

Having literary drunk our lunch, we were now set to eat the dinner! Earnestly, we did not expect as much solid food as the liquid one.  We set off for the popular Mama Colonel, don’t ask me who the colonel was or is!  

This is small and modest joint located somewhere in Bandari (did not see any port though).  

The amazing thing is that, though we spoke Swahili to a great degree, the majority of Kinshasa Congolese hardly understand Swahili, on the contrary, the Lingala language conflicts with Swahili.

As soon as we arrived, SKOL began flowing, flowing faster than the River Congo.  If we continued at this pace, someone was bound to get “drowned” faster than anticipated.

I was in the company of one or two so called “mad Jaluwos”, they kept bragging that, they “drink” Lake Victoria to near extinction, what of this tiny water body (River Congo).  

True to their word, they behaved as if they were taking mere water. You know, the SKOL beer is probably one of the best beer produced north of the Limpopo, south of the Sahara.  As we were busy emptying the SKOLs, the guys in the chicken or is it kitchen, were busy doing their thing.

I am not sure if they really did roast chicken or some other sort of birds but the truth is, these chaps must have put both KFC Chicken and NANDOS to shame.  When it comes to tasty, this chicken (or whatever it was), was the most tasty I or rather we have ever taken.

We chewed the chicken until we were “fed up” (as Field Marshal Dr. Idi Amin Dada - R.I.P. would have said).  Sincerely, Kinshasa was beginning to warm up.  

This place has a mini Discotheque capable of hosting about two dozen dancers.  This club is frequented by diplomats and NGO community.   By the time we left the place, the moon must have been at the midday of the night position.

Mfashumwana@fastmail.fm

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