Dear Aunt Silvia,
I am a young man in a solid relationship with my fiancé. One day a friend of my sister came to my house uninvited and spent a whole week there. During that time she made advances at me, which I resisted in the beginning- but not for long. I jumped into her bed.
Three months down the line- she is now expecting my baby.
She has told me that the only way out is for me to marry her, and she has also threatened to tell my fiancé about it.
Is it possible for one to impregnate a woman the first time and the only time they engage in sexual activity? Am so confused- please help.
Your sister’s friend had a sinister motive when she came to your house un- invited. This tells me that she had her eyes on you all along, but did not know how to approach you until when an opportune time came.
The thing is; are you sure that the pregnancy is yours? Or you are assuming just because the girl is telling you so?
Have you tried to find out if this girl has another man that she has been having an affair with? Sometimes, it is very difficult to tell whether a pregnancy belongs to you in this kind of circumstances until when a DNA test has been made.
Also, be informed that for a woman to conceive, you don’t have to sleep with her all year round.
A one night stand can also result into a baby. So be very careful in future not to step on a live wire in this era of HIV/AIDS. You will only have yourself to blame tomorrow if you will be jumping at every skirt that comes to your house, yet you do not know their health status.
So, the only sure way to determine the paternity of the child in question is to suggest a DNA test to the lady, then the truth will be out.
After that the decision about the baby and the mother will be entirely yours.
In the meantime as you are dealing with the expectant girl, I suggest that you talk to your fiancé and inform her of the current situation you have found yourself in. You will be very lucky if she understands and forgives you.
But all the same, take courage- she is better off getting the story from you than somebody else. Also be prepared for any eventuality in case the baby is found to be yours, and the possibility that your fiancé might break your relationship.
In the meantime try and put your life in order to avoid further embarrassment.