Diaspoman:Credit crunch hits Diaspoman ‘s throat

During these very hard financial times, I no longer enjoy credit facilities from booze sellers! That is to say that credit crunch has seriously and negatively impacted on my ever dry and rusty throat!

During these very hard financial times, I no longer enjoy credit facilities from booze sellers! That is to say that credit crunch has seriously and negatively impacted on my ever dry and rusty throat!

How I wish those old days could just return! Yes, during those mid 90s, we used to crush bottle after bottle only to pay up at the end of the month. At Béa’s joint, we used to guzzle and just sign the bills.

This meant that we could afford to buy rounds for everyone seated in the pub.

This depended on our moods – when our moods were high, all patrons inside Béa’s joint would partake of the ever flowing booze.

This trend continued until we started to break our promises to Béa! We found it quite unsustainable and we actually blame Béa herself for her small tricks. She is the one who led us into the credit crisis that had hit us! So, you see, this credit crunch is not very new to me.
  Anyways, Béa’s joint was so irresistible that even in our financial crises at that time; we would always pay her a visit! Her joint was always vibrant - with loudspeakers perched up in every corner booming out with Rumba and Zouk music all night long.

 Men came in to guzzle drinks and to also search for future brides. Aggrey and I were no exceptions. Whenever we sat on the stools at the bar, Béa would give us both a serious wink. That wink was to suggest to us that some chicks were seated in a corner all by themselves.

Our instincts would then work at overdrive. Within a flash, Aggrey and I would be seated next to the nice looking chicks 

 We would then guzzle bottle after bottle. In addition to our guzzling, the pretty chicks would smile and guzzle. They would take in the most expensive liquors for all the hours of the night.

Whenever they flashed their charming smiles, we would find our hands beckoning Béa very fast. We would proceed to harass Béa for delaying more rounds! Béa would then rush back to the counter from where she would unleash yet another expensive bottle of Amarula. She would then throw out another hot wink .

All this time, we couldn’t click that this was a private arrangement between Béa and the ladies. She had used them as leverage so that her slow moving stocks would be consumed at a much faster rate.

Béa never bothered whether we consumed on a cash or credit basis. That is why she just piled all the bills every night for us to sign.

Aggrey was smarter. He never liked signing the bills. So all this signing was just left for me. This meant that I was responsible for paying up the bills.

When we sobered up several weeks later, we discovered a long bill from Béa’s joint at our doorstep. The amount must have been thrice as big as our meager salaries combined together.

We did not have the funds to settle this bill. Our strategy was to locate another drinking hole. But this was not amusing for Béa. So she went straight to the Brigade to arrange for our arraignment.

After realizing that things had become monkey-ish for us, we decided to flee town. It later on turned out that Aggrey was a free man since his signatures appeared nowhere. As for me, I had to pack up and hide myself abroad in the Diaspora. All this as a result of smiles and guzzles at Chez Béa…

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