A lady’s battle for recognition

Some women will do whatever it takes to gain recognition. For such, the end justifies the means, or so says Chantelle Barasa a former student at Kigali Institute of Education (KIE).

Some women will do whatever it takes to gain recognition. For such, the end justifies the means, or so says Chantelle Barasa a former student at Kigali Institute of Education (KIE).

The 28-year-old believes that women need to be given attention, after having been victims of gender inequality for so many years.

“They are now trying to recover from the previous discrimination and abuse like harmful traditional practices. That holds truth. However, it’s also quiet possible to make movement without necessary making any progress.

This is exactly what some women are experiencing in their careers opting for other frontiers. This is not intended to offend anyone.

But, some of these women tend to be more social, considerate, and always on their best behaviour trying as much as they can to impress those around them. This is not awful. But more often, when this nice lady’s altitude is carried into adulthood, it seems more than natural.

In a recent informal survey, many people, men especially, claimed that this nice ‘lady’s altitude’ is the very thing that has kept many of them outstanding, and often win favours, than those who tend to stick on their principles. For them, they will arrogantly assert that they can only act and socialise when it’s necessary.

Christopher Habimana, 35, says there are several “mistakes” women of that caliber tend to make that sabotage their career.

He adds that, for example some of these women unintentionally engage into self-defeating habits that make them look garish and often loose their seriousness.

However, according to certain African traditions, “a woman is supposed to keep her pride as a woman and keep a low profile.” Probably this belief was valid during the tme of our foremothers.

Ironically enough, or just plain odd, acting cheaply all in the name of recognition does not yield one any good. There is also as the adage that goes, “The squeaky wheel gets the geese”.

Perhaps this fits in this particular situation. While struggling to be recognised at her place of work, neighbourhood, or in the family, may unfortunately take her time to achieve her goal.

Do not let yourself to be an office document where the line between being liked and being used is blurred. Again, there are some women/girls who create recognition by dressing unprofessionally and sometimes wear too much makeup.

Do not over apply it because no one has ever told you that you look gorgeous, and you are now in unnecessary battle to make a difference. But, again do not go to your place of work looking like it was by coincidence to go there.

Too much make-up normally sends a wrong message. So, in order to avoid all those avoidable mistakes, try as much as possible to wear sufficient makeup, and clothes that fit for the occasion. Trust us, you will standout and your presence will be justified.

How you talk and present yourself in public also matters a lot. Some women use diminutive words and phrases to describe themselves in the name of creating recognition, by signifying how unique and expensive they are.

For example she might start by telling you how expensive she is, and how she hates to be associated with cheap stuffs. Fine! But you do not need to make it a tool to step on other people’s heads. Lower your standards and tricks a little bit and learn how to live with every person in harmony.

Contact: lindaonly2005@yahoo.com

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