The clumsy excuse that got me off the hook

And so, I had a rather interesting (tongue-in-cheek) with my cousin over the weekend for not completing a job properly. I’m one of those people who believe that if a job is ‘nearly well done’ then its well done but my mum doesn’t understand this and she wronged me. According to unwritten male rules, I had finished the job in record time. The job in question was cleaning shoes and it was done. The shoes were ‘kinda’ clean. Let’s just say that once I put on trousers over the half-cleaned shoes, anyone would see the top part that was cleaned. In fact, there would be no dirt visible on the shoes; I questioned the wisdom of bothering to clean at all.Minutes later, I was beckoned to the laundry room. “Dean, why didn’t you put away the basin, soap and brush after cleaning? The job is not finished unless you clean up the area you have used”.My argument was that once I start cleaning up, it’s a new job. I argued that “I didn’t put them away because the whole laundry room will be cleaned later. So, it would be double work”. Before I was even mid-way through my clumsy excuse, my cousin was long gone before I realised that she stopped listening when I tried to convince her that I was in the right. She just snapped, “Don’t give me your lame excuse.”She didn’t realise that it wasn’t an excuse but rather a reason. That’s the difference. Excuse suggests that I’m in the wrong and irresponsible. Whenever someone asks if you have an excuse, like it or not, they’ve already delivered the guilty verdict and just want to see how small-minded you are. This is how judges entertain themselves.On the contrary, a reason is a conceivable explanation for unintentional behaviour. More like proof of innocence. There was a reason I didn’t clean up after cleaning my shoes. I would eventually clean up but had to wait for the laundry room to be organised besides I’m no psychologist to read someone’s mind and know when they would organise the laundry room. I left everything there and went to the lounge and indulged myself by watching 22 adult males chasing a piece of rubber. As I refilled my bladder with juice, I reasoned that the room might be organised and I should go clean up. No sooner had I jumped from the comfort of the chair than another idea came to me. Instead of wasting my energy putting them in order, why can’t she wait till I go back again to clean? I reasoned that I would organise them next time I went back to clean the shoes again. I smiled to myself as I as I realised I would be saving everyone time, money and energy by leaving them where they were until then.That was when I was called again and reprimanded. The most interesting part is when my cousin picked up the basin, brush and soap and arranged them accordingly - her way of showing me how easy the job was.Guess what, that gave me more reason not to lift a finger next time I use the laundry room; if I leave it long enough, she will do it.