Butterflies caused by family gatherings

This week is ending well for me though it has been one of those where my stomach was filled with butterflies. I have two ‘married’ brothers. Married is in quotes because for an older brother, we did a traditional ceremony when their first born child was six years. The second one has not done even a quarter of that. My family is one where things are rarely done in an official manner and properly. It had to be none other than my sister to change the trend. She is the one who is hard working, faithful, disciplined and extremely organised. I shed a tear when she sent a message saying she was bringing her man to meet the family.

I remember my brothers bringing their women home, they were introduced as ‘my friend’ because at the time it was just a friendship and, we had not gotten that kind of training. My father and mother wed after 30 years of living together! Understandable, yeah?

I have always prayed for my siblings and it gives me joy to mention them, their spouses and their children.

This experience might not mean much to someone who has grown up in a very strict home where girls never leave until they are ready for marriage and are indeed moving in with a husband. But for my case where a girl left home in her early 20s and all these years it is very obvious that they are seeing someone or some people but not even once has anyone been brought home, parents worry.

A day like this is one of pride and joy for them. As if that is not enough, the parents have welcomed people for their sons and always longed for the day they would welcome guests for a girl child. This is no mean feat!

Two things caused the butterflies, first I was placing myself in my parents’ shoes and imagining what they were going through, and that is how my body reacted. Then I’m thinking of when we will be called to the front by my parents to be introduced, if by any chance spouses and girlfriends join the squad I will be the lone ranger, the only unaccompanied one. Picture those family gatherings where the aunties want to get into your business by asking, when is yours coming, why is your stomach looking bigger, aren’t you growing old, then, when are you giving us a child? Just do it even if there is no husband, children are a blessing blah blah blah. 

This happens at weddings and funerals, I am imagining how they will ogle and sympathise with me for being the last man standing. Oh goodness, it is going to be a long weekend but come what may, I am very excited and happy for my siblings. That they all don’t have to endure long cold nights is something that will get me dancing and singing with joy anytime. I pray they continue to be happy with the people they have chosen to spend their lives with.

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