When I talked about money in my previous relationship, I was shocked to learn that some men today still enjoy the title of breadwinner regardless of how times have changed. I thought men had kind of accepted that one day they would be Mr. Stay-at-home dad while their wives brought home the cheddar. That is not the truth. Till this day, being the breadwinner of the family plays a part in a man’s psychology; it makes them feel like they are real men, doing what God intended them to do. During the Sarah Palin elections in the US, it was refreshing to see a man take care of his home and a baby with Down syndrome, to top it all off, he was always there by her side on the campaign trail. Truth is a lot of men would not be able to do that. In today’s society, you would think that people are used to women working hard and earning more than their husbands. Some families have adjusted to the situation, while in others, you still hear of men not being fully comfortable with the idea that his wife contributes a bigger portion to the family income. Back to the day my ex and I talked about money, I assumed he knew he would always make less than me. For starters, my academic credentials are higher and I work in a field that simply allows me to make more than him. I made half jokes about him staying home to take care of the kids while I was out hustling. He didn’t find this funny and he told me as honestly as he could that he would do everything to be the main breadwinner. I think men need to learn that in this day, women will probably make more than them and hope that it doesn’t affect their relationship. Very many people will agree that Rwandan society has empowered women but this does not mean that everyone has adjusted overnight. Let’s be honest, this is not limited to Rwandans but to the world and men in general because most of them are still not comfortable with the idea of women making more money than them. Have you talked to your partner about this? How did it go?
