When Tsatsi Rugege began sharing TikTok videos showcasing activities and places people could visit to disconnect from alcohol consumption, she didn’t know she was laying the foundation for a larger community. What started as her personal journey to overcome alcohol dependency has evolved into the Sober Friendly Circle, a safe and judgement-free space where individuals battling addiction can connect, share experiences, and receive support from professionals. ALSO READ: There is life after addiction: Victims describe ordeal “I had recently quit drinking, and I found that a lot of my lifestyle revolved around drinking. So, I kind of needed to rebuild it and I thought others might too,” said Rugege, a theatre and performance graduate from the University of Cape Town. She posted a TikTok video asking if anyone felt the same way and if they were looking for a space to meet, hang out, and create a supportive community. The response was overwhelming, and that marked the birth of Sober Friendly Circle, Rugege explained. ALSO READ: Mental health: Understanding risks of social media addiction, finding balance Happening every Tuesday evening, the Sober Friendly Circle has been active over a month, yet according to Rugege, more than 100 people have already joined, sharing personal stories, encouragement, and building meaningful connections that support thise recovering from addictions. While therapy and avoiding triggers are often cited as essential in overcoming addiction, Rugege highlighted that human connection and judgement-free spaces play an even greater role. “People have been really showing up and bringing great energy and, honestly, a great sense of vulnerability and willingness to open up,” she said. “As much as I facilitate the circle, I've also learned so much from the attendees. There are highly intelligent and self-aware people.” Rugege mentioned that while there are a variety of addictions and dependencies discussed in her club, issues around relationships (professional, family, and romance), drugs, and alcoholism are also common. She underscored that the narrative of associating addiction and dependency only with alcoholism should change as people could be addicted and dependent to even far more complicated unhealthy emotional attachments. Even though the Sober Friendly Circle is a peer-led support group, Rugege noted that it also integrates professional guidance. “Our community is hosted at a mental health center called The Circle Kigali, where we work closely with their therapists and psychologists who attend our circle and to offer guidance, advice and support or clinical assistance, if necessary,” she noted. Psychologist’s perspective on addiction and recovery Clinical psychologist Divine Rusagara defines addiction as a state in which a person loses control over recurring behaviors to the extent that it interferes with daily life, relationships, and career. ALSO READ: Ndera hospital introduces new treatment for opioid addiction Rusagara underscored that it is hard to overcome addiction individually, citing research that showed that those who take on a sobriety journey solely, barely make it. “Most of the time you need other people to help you, especially with accountability. When people are in the group, they help each other, they encourage each other,” she added. “It has been shown that it is most unlikely to recover on your own unless you are in a group or maybe you have a mentor, preferably someone who passed through that and recovered from it.” Rusagara also addressed the societal judgement that people struggling with addiction often face, emphasizing that blame and guilt only worsen the problem. She said that what truly helps is offering positive encouragement and creating spaces where people feel understood. “Research has shown that one of the reasons why people fall into addiction is loneliness and lack of meaningful relationships,” Rusagara said. “It has been shown that when you have a deep and meaningful relationship, either with a family member or a best friend or a partner, you have many chances not to fall into addiction. So one of the ways to recover is also to be able to build those meaningful relationships.” The reality of recovery For Steve Khald Shema, a filmmaker and poet celebrating five years of recovery from drug addiction, the road to recovery is never-ending. “There is no such thing as a ‘recovered’ drug addict; recovery is forever. You have to wake up and constantly remind yourself of the war you are fighting, physically and emotionally. You have to face it raw,” Shema said. Shema noted that the hardest thing is to reintegrate into the community after addiction because of the shame, judgement, and coming back as a changed person in a society that maintains the same triggers. Shema said it was difficult for him to get professional support and he found safe spaces an important alternative. “Having a safe space while recovering is crucial because that's how you let out your pain, and background traumas and find a healthy place to vent and get vulnerable without fear of being judged,” he noted. “My biggest realization is that life is actually good and recovery is possible. And it's never too late to do so.”
