Apparently being a woman does not automatically make you a lady. Being a lady, it is believed, one has to have class and self-respect. We have heard so many customs that should govern a lady and some, I admit, are deplorable. When ‘modern’ is added to ‘lady’, you probably picture a wild, conceited, and probably well-to-do female. Well, there is not always one way to see it. But there are certain things, thankfully, I will never have to go by simply because we are in the 21st Century. For example; Never will I ever force myself to take on masculine traits just to be considered a strong woman. Some girls fight their emotions at the expense of their happiness just to be regarded as tough. No, thanks. I choose to embrace my sensitivity, emotional and nurturing nature. I will still be independent, bring my ideas to the board of opinions, say what I mean, be consistent and adopt more qualities because, by the way, it is okay to learn along the way and not have everything figured out just yet. Never will I ever hate another girl for spiteful reasons. But never will I ever pretend to like another girl if I don’t mean it. We know the drama between women fighting for men. Men, who, probably do not care about any of them. Or in instances of polygamy, women pretend to be okay with the situation while hating on each other heavily and deeply. But also the modern facade of calling everyone “sis” (sister) should be called what it is, pretence. Never will I ever pretend to have money in front of a guy when I don’t. You know the question, ‘what do you bring to the table?’ Well, I don’t see why I should lie about not needing help just because it may come from a man. This, I believe, does not make me less of a female, just because I choose honesty and transparency. Hear me well, however, because as a modern lady I will not be idle and wait for the gentleman to provide. Nor, I hope, will he expect me to be submissive. Never will I ever die of hunger, not out of poverty, but because of an endless diet to try and adhere to societal standards. However, if I ever feel uncomfortable in my own body because of how much weight I have gained or lost then I will be happy to go on a diet, for me and nobody else. Never will I ever wear clothes I do not like just to adhere to some standards. Some ladies will opt to wear ugly colourless outfits to be regarded as ‘more serious’ and ‘less provocative’. Others will dress to impress too much, with the “I don’t care” mentality. Well, you choose. Regardless of the occasion and what I choose to wear, as a lady who respects herself, I will make sure my clothes/shoes are freshly cleaned, look crisp, and ironed to perfection. The point is, “as long as I feel comfortable”. Again, we don’t want to encourage a culture that objectifies women, to see them for their bodies, instead of their intelligence, thoughts, and opinions. However, we can be strong, intelligent, thoughtful, and respectable and still dress in a way that puts value on our feminine figures. Never will I ever decide to put makeup on or not because of someone else’s opinion. Ladies, it is okay to use that special tool to highlight your beautiful eyes or cover up acne and so on. It is okay not to go out without lipstick on if you don’t fancy it. You are a lady regardless. Never will I ever follow rules on how to be a lady. Although indirect, rules of any kind are just another way to confine people. PS; I’m not talking about government rules and laws, arrest me not. But then if women still followed every rule, we still wouldn’t have the right to vote or lead.
