By Jeremy Solomons As we continue to celebrate International Women’s Day this week, it would seem like a good time to talk about male leaders’ role in ending bias, discrimination and violence against women and girls and achieving real and sustainable gender equity. The first part of this equation is particularly important in light of recent high-profile allegations of sexual harassment against New York state governor Andrew Cuomo; sexual assault and rape against French actor Gerard Depardieu; and sexual misconduct against Zimbabwe’s Vice President Kembo Mohadi, which led him to resign. Here in Rwanda where women represent more than 60 per cent of the lower house of parliament and six out of 16 local banks are led by women, we are still grappling with such important issues as women’s job opportunities, security and losses and their work/family responsibilities, as well as increased domestic conflict and abuse during the Corona pandemic. One of the ways of proactively dealing with these issues and promoting true gender equity – which is different from “equality” as was discussed in the “Leading Rwanda” column on Inclusion and Equity published last 19 November – is getting all male leaders to be more engaged and involved. There are a lot of articles and programmes these days about “Men as Allies”, which seems like a safe and logical place to start. In practice, allyship may not be enough on its own as many male leaders may just appear to be doing the right thing by signing collective statements or attending occasional events without having any actual “skin in the game”. Pressure is now rising around the world for male leaders to also become more public advocates and avowed activists, taking consistent and sustainable action to promote and achieve gender equity for all. And sometimes male leaders might even need to get their point across by becoming “Angry Men”, who feel and show their strong passion for and deep commitment to an equitable workplace and society in a healthy and non-violent way. For this writer personally, this means taking any constructive action I can to ensure that my daughter Emma and other young women can be empowered, recognized and rewarded in the workplace because of who they are and what they do and not how they look. Here are 10 things that all men – but particularly male leaders - can do now to be more active and effective in terms of Gender (and other forms of) Equity: 1. Know who you are and what you stand for. Clarify your own values and goals. Identify your own hot buttons and blind spots. 2. Embrace complexity, ambiguity, inconsistency and fallibility in your own life (and in others’). We are all human. 3. Seek out and connect with other allies, advocates and activists of all genders for solidarity and support. 4. Have the difficult or awkward conversation with others around gender (in-)equity. Usually in a private, safe place. 5. Recognize and then swiftly and sincerely take responsibility for any transgressions you may have committed in the past. An authentic apology to the aggrieved party is never too late. Nor are personal amends and/or reparations, if appropriate. 6. Really listen to the stories of victims of gender inequity, injustice and violence. Ask appropriate questions when the time is right. Avoid the temptation to launch into problem-solving right away. 7. Do the same with those who have actually been abusive, complicit or oblivious themselves. Try to build bridges with them, however repulsed or frustrated you may feel on a personal level. And find a way to show compassion and forgiveness if they are genuinely remorseful. 8. Always try to walk your talk and if you are in a position of power, be a proactive and positive role model for others. 9. Stand up, speak out and act up for gender equity, working with and for people of all genders in a caring, practical and non-patronizing way. 10. Remain strong, compassionate and consistent. And keep going despite any distractions and discouragement. In conclusion, gender equity is certainly not just about women’s leadership anymore. Nor is it - as tennis superstar Serena Williams recently said - just about who is the greatest female athlete of all time. It’s about how we all lead and learn together; share, support and follow each other; and then help each other to thrive and shine. “As more and more women, men and young people raise their voices and become active … change happens.” (UNHCR high commissioner and former Chilean president, Michelle Bachelet) The views expressed in this column are entirely those of the writer who can be reached at jeremy@jeremysolomons.com
