I attended an international conference last week. I was a small timid attendant in a sea of experts. I thought that all discussions would go over my average-sized inexperienced brain. Then I started listening carefully to what the experts had to say and I realized that I knew the stuff! So why did they sound so impressively intelligent? And then it hit me; confidence. From then on I paid more attention to the mannerisms of experts and now I know how to be one. You start with body language. People pay a lot of attention to your body when you talk. They pick up fear, anxiety, dishonesty, timidity just by the way you stand, sit and walk. So they can certainly pick up ‘expertise’ the same way. You want someone to believe you? Look them in the eye and hold their gaze. You want to be believably distraught? Gesture a lot. You want to appeal to someone? Lean forward. You want to exude expertise? Work on your gait; shoulders back, chest and feet slightly out. Sit upright. Legs crossed if possible. When you have your body language under control, then you can move on to verbal communication. Now the key is not really what you say but the words you use to say it. You can’t just say “smoking is bad for you.” You have to say, “Smoking is detrimental to your wellbeing.” Or something fancier. So if you want to be an expert, a dictionary is your friend. To back up the big words, use facts and figures, but only those which are not easily verifiable, at least not until long after you’ve made your case and received your thunderous applause. If the information is easily verifiable, make sure it is up to date. Or at least put a disclaimer. Ah disclaimers! Such a wonderful thing when you’re not sure of what you’re saying but you still want people to believe that you’re an expert. You must not, under any circumstance, use the phrase “I don’t know.” Say “in my personal opinion.” Or “It depends on how you look at it.” Say, “This is something that continues to change.” When you put disclaimers you prevent someone from attacking you or challenging you because you didn’t really own your words. You want to know if any of it works? Ask my friend Paula who got her first job based on confidence alone. She said that the interviewers turned bosses told her after she had been recruited that they were amused and impressed at how she gave wrong answers with such confidence that they were willing to teach her everything else. But don’t take my word for it; do your own verification. Find out who wins elections. Is it always the most qualified candidate or the most charismatic? Who is the boss? The smartest guy or the best talker? Who has more girlfriends? The richest guy or the most charming? Okay maybe I went a bit too far with the last one but you catch my drift.
