Anastasia Murekeyimana, 72, has been on a journey of healing and forgiveness for the past 30 years. It has not been an easy one, having lost two of her children and husband during the 1994 Genocide against the Tutsi. In the aftermath of the Genocide that claimed over one million innocent lives in just 100 days, Murekeyimana found herself with two children to raise singlehandedly and barely anything to get them going. She received assistance from AERG— an association of student survivors of the Genocide—in paying for her children’s education, however, she lacked the emotional support she needed. She raised her two surviving children singlehandedly while working as a high school teacher in Rusatira sector, Huye District in the Southern Province. ALSO READ: From surviving to thriving: 20 years of GAERG empowering Genocide survivors, supporting Rwanda Despite experiencing anger, trauma, and grief, she knew she had to fulfil the roles of mother and father to her children. In the face of her emotional and mental struggles, she persisted in her quest to provide a better life for her children. In 2005, Murekeyimana received news that the man who had killed her family members had been released from prison. Gervain Ntagungira, from Rusatira sector, who had been tried and convicted for his role in the Genocide, served eight years of a 20-year sentence at the Huye Correctional Facility before his release. He returned home, eager to be reintegrated into society. Ntagungira was reintegrated into the community where he had killed many. Murekeyimana was surprised to see him moving around freely and leading a decent life, while she was still mourning and doing her utmost to move forward. ALSO READ: Reconciliation as genocide perpetrators in Bugesera are forgiven by the victims “Healing and forgiving are two things you work on with time, but having to see the person who killed your family every day in society is another kind of pain on its own, and I would be lying if I said it was pleasant for me to see him every day,” Murekeyimana said. She added: “But the more hate and anger consumed me, the more I realised I wasn’t going to do anything about it, I even started wondering if I would die with so much hate and anger.” Despite their efforts to avoid each other, Murekeyimana and Ntagungira had to participate in Sunday mass at a Catholic church in Kiruhura sector, Huye District. The church had a reintegration and training programme aimed at promoting reconciliation between perpetrators and survivors of the Genocide, fostering unity within the church instead of allowing resentment to prevail. Furthermore, the programme offered emotional support and essential resources to facilitate peaceful coexistence between perpetrators and survivors in society. “I didn’t want to participate in the programme, but I pondered how long I would be able to hold onto my resentment and anger. Eventually, I came to the conclusion that I had to let go of my grudge—not because I was forgetting, but because I had to move on with my life and provide for my two kids, and look to the future,” Murekeyimana added. ALSO READ: Kill the Devil: Authors reflect on the essence of forgiveness, reconciliation It took them six months, with the first three dedicated to receiving training and instructions separately before they were brought together in the same room to start their healing journey together. “When you sit with someone whose whole family you killed and can talk, it is a traumatic experience for both of you. You have to repeat everything you did and ask for forgiveness,” Ntagungira said. “And the majority of the convicted perpetrators who are still serving their sentences believe that I am selling them out because I am detailing what happened to get forgiveness. They don’t think that telling the truth aids in one’s own healing; instead, they continue to believe that it will lengthen their sentence,” Ntagungira added. ALSO READ: Genocide convict: Telling the truth has set me free After the six-month programme, Murekeyimana and Ntagungira reconciled and became peaceful members of society, inspiring others to offer forgiveness, and heal, as they witnessed its benefits. They also founded a community called “Babarira Ubone Amahoro” where they promote forgiveness and healing among new members. “After being forgiven, I feel at peace, which was not the case before,” Ntagungira said. Murekeyimana’s neighbours called her a fool when she invited them to participate in the healing process, but that didn’t stop her from forgiving the person who killed some of her family members. She remarked, “I didn’t want to die with anger, bitterness, and hatred, so I chose the forgiveness and healing journey.”
