Today’s stress levels and associated health issues are on the rise globally. Demanding work routines, workplace tensions, growing materialistic tendencies, addictions, erratic eating habits, and disrupted sleep patterns are cited as key factors contributing to these challenges. There is, however, another factor that contributes to increased stress, often overlooked; talking excessively and saying the wrong things. Many people speak without thinking. Words simply slip out spontaneously without realising the harm they are inflicting on another person or even on self. What they consider as ‘harmless gossip’ may be harmful to someone. The fact is, many people know what to say, but very few know what not to say. The tongue is a very small part of the body, but it can be responsible for success or failure in the world. A couple argues at home in the morning. Despite being loving, they exchange hurtful words in anger. This leads to tension and irritability, causing them to easily lose their temper with others. Whether it’s a co-worker, children, or household help, everyone ends up feeling stressed. Someone does not like their superior—for whatever reason—they talk ill about them with a colleague or friend. Words once uttered no longer remain under the control of the speaker. Now the person is anxious that if their words are reported to the boss, they may be punished or fired. Knowingly or unknowingly, a person may say something bitter to a close friend or family member, and the relationship is broken forever. A leader or well-known person of society may give an inflammatory speech and mindless violence is unleashed by people after that, over those who have not harmed them in any way. All this can be avoided simply if people learn to avoid unnecessary speaking and negative things. One can see the influence of soft speaking on others. You are in a fix or a complicated situation that no one else can solve, and a friend or relative says some soothing words to you, well you feel better after that and feel motivated to find a solution. Great people all over the world have generated peace, union, and love among people by the influence of their speeches. When one speaks something positive to others, their mind becomes relaxed. There is a very sound scientific basis underlying the philosophy of speaking softly and selectively. When one is agitated or angry either by speaking or listening to harsh words, there is a sudden release of adrenalin in the body. This causes an acute increase in the pulse rate, resulting in palpitations, an increase in blood pressure, and even heart attacks. Attacks of asthma can also be precipitated. Diseases like gastric ulcers, strokes, etc. can also develop following harsh speech. Chronic manifestations of stress like loss of appetite, headache, insomnia, and palpitations eventually follow. Therefore, it is better to avoid using harsh words, taunts and jibes, or even abusive language while speaking to someone. They may be a neighbour, family member, colleague, student, or stranger, older or younger than you, but words that hurt should never be used. When you say something harsh to someone, they will never forget it. And someday, they may retaliate. It is human nature to lose temper at times which may be justified or unjustified. But still, one can reprimand the other person pointing out their mistake softly and firmly without using harsh language. The dictum should be, to think and weigh words before speaking, speak less, and what is necessary. This will ensure good mental as well as physical health and happiness for all concerned. Dr Rachna Pande is a specialist in internal medicine.
