Learning to say, No

Do you find it difficult to say “no”? Are you always trying to please everyone at your own expense?  One friend of mine called Michael once told me of how his friends have made it a habit to borrow his property; shoes and clothes especially, and return them unwashed or damaged.

Monday, January 09, 2012
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Do you find it difficult to say "no”? Are you always trying to please everyone at your own expense?

One friend of mine called Michael once told me of how his friends have made it a habit to borrow his property; shoes and clothes especially, and return them unwashed or damaged.

"It leaves me feeling exploited and abused, but I fear letting them know about how I feel because they may think that I am selfish and intolerant,” he lamented.

For Fear of jeopardizing the relationships we have with people close to us, we give in to whatever requests and offers they make, even when our conscience and principles do not match the demands. As a result, this leaves us feeling compromised or cheated.

It is important to know that, saying "no” to someone, does not mean rejection, but rather is a frank way of showing that your principles do not agree with what they are asking you to do. As much as we are close to someone, every individual should have the courage to step up and say no instead of being coerced into doing something they do not like or agree with.

I am not advocating for selfishness, I know those who are mean may begin using this as an excuse. I am just emphasizing the fact that sometimes it is better to be sincere with people and let them know that you do not agree with them. This is definitely better than keeping silent.

ivan.ngoboka5@gmail.com