Striving to emulate a father

I sat in front of my television in awe as I watched Pastor Mark Kigozi give his daily inspiration message on NBS telling parents to always let their children know what jobs they do, how tiring the job is and if they can be able to make a choice for them.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

I sat in front of my television in awe as I watched Pastor Mark Kigozi give his daily inspiration message on NBS telling parents to always let their children know what jobs they do, how tiring the job is and if they can be able to make a choice for them.

How cool it must be to watch your father on prime-time television telling all and sundry how you know what he does and between what time span.

Very few actually see their parents, leave alone knowing what they do and being answerable to their children when they come home late.

How cool it must be to see your dad while being admired and praised by everyone, take the time in front of a worldwide audience to express what special bonds he shares with you in his life.

Talk about making the other kids at your school envious. Most of us can only imagine what it must be like to have a celebrity father. Fathers are supposed to read newspapers all day.

Fathers are supposed to sit in a bar and drink till late. Fathers are supposed to sit around on Sundays and watch football games. Fathers aren’t supposed to be cool.

And if they do, they aren’t supposed to act normal too.

But Mark did just that. The touching inspirational message, and the normalcy of the man who gave it, made me think about the importance of fatherhood, and the impact my father, and my grandfather, had on my life.

Life has it’s own sense of humour and as God decided. October 1, 2011 marked 20 years since I last saw the man that I strive hard to emulate, but still have probably 50 years to learn what he knew at his young age when the Almighty decided to call him.

At a young age of four years I still have memories of motorcycle rides around town and of a man brave enough to kill a rat when I woke him up in the middle of the night scared as hell!

I learned important lessons from my father and grandfather through my mother, relatives and their friends, not only through their words, but mostly through their actions.

I’m sure I’m not alone. Like the old saying, "Like father, like son,” boys are influenced tremendously by their fathers and grandfathers and other men in their lives. These men may not be Pastor Mark.

They may not be doctors, or lawyers or politicians. But to their sons, they are revered as if they are the most powerful men in the world.

f course, my father was never on T.V (I still have the Black and White Elekta T.V he owned) or even heard his voice on Radio for that matter.

But he did his work diligently with intelligence and his service to his country is priceless. My daddy never made a million francs for giving inspirational advice on T.V.

But he did earn an honest living, and with it, a sense of security and well-being that I appreciate to this day.

My father never received a standing ovation by scores of admirers. But 20 years later his name is associated with success and he is still at the receiving end of praises from my mother, my siblings.

As I’ve gotten older, I find myself increasingly doing the same. I hope they do get to him.

My father never made the front page of the newspaper. But he left his genes in me as he was an ardent reader of newspapers, and as I grow older, I finally realize the importance of reading the newspaper. Kind of explains my choice of career.

Although my father never gave a dramatic performance, to me, he was more than a leading man. He was a family man, a man who never made headlines, but a man who set strict guidelines and a man who left no doubt that he was the head of the family.

Consistently consistent, he helped mold in me a sense of pride that defines who I am today.

Another person who has had a profound impact on my life is my mother, a lady who single-handedly has raised four children with one being a constant headache into a formidable family that is frequented by visitors from all walks of life.

Soft and emotional as a mother but strict with a firm grip like a father!It was my dream to see them together and see what a tag-team they would have made but it seems I still have a long way to go.

She has taught me to always use my brain instead of my back. A hardworking, honest woman, my mother has taught me to take chances, to always strive for more.

As I’ve gotten older, I have come to appreciate the simple things in life that my Dad taught me at a tender age and those that rubbed off my mother and she continued his legacy have taught me.

Growing up, it was all about being cool and making people notice me. Well, my Dad didn’t strive for attention; he just made sure he always did the best with what he had. And for that, I am just as proud of him as any child is proud of his Dad.

Now, one time I will be a father myself, I will be forced by the weight of my title to try to live up to the standards set by my Dad in my life. It will be a tough proposition, and in many ways, a mission impossible.

Times might be different then. While in many ways things probably will have gotten better for the human race, in many ways, especially with keeping a family together, things are as tough as ever.

The family unit isn’t cherished like it once was. Marriage is no longer as sacred, or not as customary, as it used to be. In fact, nowadays, being married is a sure way to stand out. Used to be that most boys wanted to grow up to be family men! In today’s society, being a "player” seems, at times, to be the most sought-after occupation.

Fatherhood is tough, it’s no lie. The importance of it often gets lost in life’s day-to-day struggles. But to me, there is no more important, or rewarding, job than being a good father, leaving a legacy your children can be proud of.

That’s why Pastor Mark’s inspirational message hit home for me. If more men were like their fathers, if more men were like their parents, if more men were like Pastor Mark, more men would see the importance of being a family man. My Dad never won any important accolade, or making a million-francs salary each year.

It is about how he touched our lives in ways we will remember for the rest of our lives. Because in the end, you get a smile or hug or have your praises sang by your children. On behalf of the beautiful family you and Mum started, we are immensely proud of you. Talk to you soon.

jeav202@yahoo.com