Building confidence and avoiding gossip!

Gossip can be found in just about every place. Some will say it’s just harmless fun but rarely is that the case. In fact, it’s a great way to destroy one’s self confidence. Gossip is seductive though and it’s very easy to get caught up in it. But, have you ever thought about why people do it when they know they shouldn’t?

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Gossip can be found in just about every place. Some will say it’s just harmless fun but rarely is that the case. In fact, it’s a great way to destroy one’s self confidence.

Gossip is seductive though and it’s very easy to get caught up in it. But, have you ever thought about why people do it when they know they shouldn’t?

Some of the main reasons people gossip probably include: It makes one feel more powerful or popular; to attract attention and feel centre stage for a moment, it makes one feel like they are part of a group.

If one gossips, they need to take a look at what’s happening in their life. Do one feel like they’re powerless? What positive changes can they make? It’s important when you’re feeling out of control that you’re able to take action instead of only reacting to the events that occur in your life.

The other side of this is that if someone gossips to you, you need to ask, "Why are they telling you this information?” This tells a lot about the person who’s gossiping to you.

So, how destructive is gossip to one who is involved? Take a look at what happens when one gossips:

They lose all their credibility with their co-workers and people will no longer trust you. They’ll wonder what you’re saying about them to other people.

One may find that the person they gossiped to will go and tell the very person they talked about. Instant office conflict. Also, one will probably feel bad about saying those things in the first place. Or if they have gossiped in an email, other people could end up seeing that email.

You’re going to worry about what others are saying about you. You end up making yourself paranoid when you probably don’t need to be.

Each time you avoid getting involved in gossip, the easier it will get. It’s the first couple of times that it will be a conscious effort to resist the temptation. It helps if you can remember the benefits you will gain by not slipping into this bad habit.

You will find that the individuals’ self confidence starts to improve greatly and people will have more respect for them. You’ll probably also find that you don’t waste anywhere near as much as time as you used to worrying about things that never come to pass. One should be able to focus on what’s important and what they want to accomplish in their life.

iruikmo@yahoo.com