Society Debate: Is it okay for women to propose to men?

That is being idle and disorderly Last week’s debate landed me in a saucepan of hot soup after I had insinuated that men who wear makeup are either gay or have issues of self-esteem.

Friday, October 29, 2010

That is being idle and disorderly

Last week’s debate landed me in a saucepan of hot soup after I had insinuated that men who wear makeup are either gay or have issues of self-esteem.
 
I received a couple of emails from Society Magazine readers disagreeing with my opinion; but the one email I can’t forget was from a gentleman whose names I promised to withhold, which said:

 "Dude! How can you equate me to Marilyn Manson simply because I wear Foundation?” He went on to argue that it is not right for me to label him gay, simply because he chooses to wear makeup.

First of all, I even didn’t know what Foundation is until now. Secondly, I don’t recall calling anybody gay. Thirdly, well… I won’t label people. You may go on and wear your make up and see how society will view you. However, I will tone down this time round.

Now, this debate at hand is a hot one! The issue of women having to kneel down and say "will you marry me?” has of late become more common than avocado on my plate. It has swept across the world and now, it has finally landed in our motherland.

By assuming that men are slow these days, many women have beaten the shyness and taken issues into their own hands.

But please, can you spare us the guilt! Who said that if a man is delaying to propose, he is being slow? Do you know how guilty a man can feel if he suddenly spotted a long time buddy bending on one knee to propose to him? Do you know how embarrassing it is? I’m talking to you young women who have played with the thought.

Just some piece of advice; if a man is delaying to propose to you, it is because he has a reason… most probably being that he doent like you…in other words, you don’t measure up to the standards of the person he wants to get married to.

So it is totally suicidal for you to clumsily take issues into your hands and assume on his behalf that he is too shy to propose to you.

As a matter of fact, its best you give him all the hints in the world that you love him so dearly, so that he does the proposal thing as he ought to, instead of rushing matters.
 Men still have that natural ego; the commanding ego to be on top of things. Proposing to a man would imply to him that you actually doubt his strengths and abilities.

On top of that, it would also imply that the woman is very impatient, or eager to get married. Inside the man’s mind, he might be thinking that the lady has been frustrated a million times by men and that’s why she wants to snatch and trap him.

Its really disrespectful, not just to the man, but to the woman himself. Imagine he rejects the marriage proposal, how is the woman going to live with the endless mocking and laughter from her friends?

mugishaivan@yahoo.com