Couples and Joint Bank Accounts

Money has been regarded as a big problem in many instances. I have heard numerous quarrels, misunderstandings and fights about money. I witnessed my parents fighting over money quite often.

Friday, April 30, 2010

Money has been regarded as a big problem in many instances. I have heard numerous quarrels, misunderstandings and fights about money. I witnessed my parents fighting over money quite often.

Every time my mother asked for extra cash, she received severe beating from my dad, sometimes without getting what she wanted. Most of the problems, if not all, resulted from money.

Today many couples break up, and in most cases, the reason is money. Money usually becomes a problem even before couples think of having joint accounts, what befall them when there is one? Personally I would disagree on opening a joint account with my husband.

I strongly believe that marriage is based on love, commitment and above all, trust. I also think it would be terrible to start a marriage and decide to have separate accounts.

It is a very negative way to start.  But if you are not ready to take up the risk, it is better not to, than to live a remorseful life.

Is it true that love and money don’t mix, just like drinking and driving? My cousin Steve told me he loves his wife to death, but he doesn’t feel safe opening a joint account with her.

"If we try it, our marriage will be at stake. We had a serious debate on that but we ended up resolving that we can do without it, and we are happy about it. There is no single advantage in it,” he adds.

As for Stephanie, he never dreamt about losing his sanity having a joint account.

"From my personal experience, there is some danger in having a joint account. When we split with my wife, the first thing she thought about was cleaning our account immediately.”

"When I decided to remarry, the same fate befell me, yet I trusted my wives. I am planning to remarry, but this time, no joint accounts and no wife. I have learned my lessons. Matter of fact, I have bought my lessons at a high price,” he said.

I don’t believe in this love is blind thing! I don’t know how blinded love can be. May be it can be blind in one eye, but not both. It helps the other opened eye to see things clearly. To see clearly that my best friend and spouse will not be honest with our money, so let’s not start it.

I am also aware that no matter how madly and deeply in love you are with your spouse, when it comes to money, one should become open and act positively for the well-being of your marriage. If you feel it is healthy to have a joint account, then go for it.

The way people handle money varies from person to person. Some are careful while others simply go overboard.
As a matter of fact, some people spend as much as they make.

Question is, how can two people from different backgrounds, with different ideologies about money decide to have a joint account? Simply put, it won’t work out.

Whether you said ‘I do’ before the priest in church, whether you share everything at home, house, drinks, ideas, bedrooms, joy and sorrow, name it.

Sharing a joint account will run the couple mad and finally your marriage. I wouldn’t go for it.

Shebs10@yahoo.com