I have a confession to make. For years, I believed in customer loyalty. As a customer experience professional, I spoke about it, trained on it, and encouraged businesses to pursue it relentlessly. But the longer I work in this field, the more I question whether loyalty truly exists in the way businesses think it does.

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Recently, I was reading The Human Experience by customer experience expert John Sills when I came across a statement that stopped me in my tracks: "Loyalty is a myth in the human experience."

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At first, I disagreed. After all, aren't we all loyal to certain brands? Don't we have favorite airlines, banks, restaurants, hotels, and service providers?

The more I reflected on it, the more I understood what he was challenging.

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Perhaps customers aren't loyal in the way businesses would like to believe. Perhaps customers simply continue choosing the option that delivers the most value, convenience, trust, and relevance at that moment in time.

And if someone comes along and makes their life easier, faster, or better, many of us will switch without hesitation. Not because we are disloyal. But because we are human.

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I learned this lesson through something as simple as an airport transfer. For years, I used the same taxi driver whenever I travelled. There was nothing wrong with him. He was reliable, punctual, and familiar. Over time, using him became a habit.

Then one day, I met another driver. Before my trip, he asked for my flight details and arrival time. When I landed, he was already waiting at the airport holding a sign with my name on it.

Immediately, the experience felt different. The car was spotless. The ride was smooth. When we arrived, he didn't ask for payment even though it was late at night. The next morning, he checked in to see how I was settling in. He asked how my trip was going, gave me options on when I wanted to pay, and offered to assist if I needed transportation during my stay.

He wasn't just providing transport. He was providing peace of mind. I switched. Not because my previous driver had failed. Not because I was disloyal, but because someone else made my life easier.

In many ways, customer loyalty is not so different from relationships. When people are courting, they often go out of their way to impress one another. They listen carefully, pay attention to details, and consistently show up. Yet anyone who has been married for a while knows that those efforts cannot stop after the wedding day.

The relationship survives because both people continue investing in it. The same is true for businesses. Customers don't stay because of what you did when you first won them over. They stay because of what you continue doing after you've earned their business.

And isn't that what customers do every day? Businesses often talk about loyalty as though it is something customers owe them. In reality, customers are constantly evaluating value. Who saves me time? Who understands my needs? Who makes me feel valued? Who removes friction from my life? Who consistently delivers on their promises?

The brand that answers those questions best usually wins. This is particularly important in markets where competition is limited. Sometimes organizations mistake lack of alternatives for customer loyalty.

But loyalty only becomes meaningful when customers have a choice. And today's customers have more choices than ever before.

The lesson for businesses is simple. Stop asking, "How do we make customers loyal?" Start asking, "Why would customers choose us again tomorrow?" Because loyalty is not something you earn once. It is something you earn repeatedly.

Through listening. Through adapting. Through removing friction. Through consistently creating value. Every interaction. Every promise. Every experience. Every day.

So, perhaps John Sills was right. Loyalty may not be a permanent state. It may simply be the outcome of consistently making customers feel that staying with you is the best decision available to them.

And if that's true, then perhaps the most important question every leader should ask is: If a better alternative appeared tomorrow, what reason would your customers have to stay?

The writer is a customer experience professional and certified hospitality trainer.