Well we all have dreams about the ‘One’, that magical person who will sweep our feet right off the ground. Women dream of that tall dark and hot man who will come spitting love and riding on that white horse or car. Our male counterparts may have their own vision of a miss perfect wrapped up in a figure eight body. Well, we grow up watering these images with countless imaginations that we gladly attach to the final look of ‘the one’. After these, we declare our waiting season.

Waiting for perfection to find us in our so imperfect forms. Then the first knock, someone to ask you out then you do a quick count and oh he or she scores seven out of the predetermined ten and for you it’s a fail.

He simply is not the one. How could he be the one if he doesn’t fit in ‘the one’s’ shoes?

You code him wrong, based on your expectations, your mother’s advice and your friends’ nagging inputs. That’s where we all go wrong.

I believe that there may be more than ONE that is compatible with you. When you find that one person, he might not fit the little test that you created when you were growing up or the little list you made with your friends but if you give them a chance you might just learn that they too can be right.

Sometimes you might even find someone who fits the description of your ‘perfect’ but he turns out to be a jerk. That’s just how life is.

One of my good friends, Tricia Mwangi, has been married to Kelvin for the past five years but when she met him she couldn’t see it ever happening.

"He just didn’t fit my description of a proper TDH-Tall dark and handsome. However, I just chose to spend time with him. Amazingly, I fell for him. Even my very good friends can’t believe I am still married to him,” she says.

Someone once told me that when dating, one has to choose who to love and in marriage it’s a case of loving your choice. When choosing your life partner, be prepared for any kind of surprise.

Your heart might never really conform to your image desires. When this happens, don’t fight it.

Embrace love when it finds you even because you might spend your whole life waiting for a person who was always by your side only dressed in a different cloth from the one you had in mind.

Well I ask all singles out there, could it be that the reason you are alone is because you have put the bar too high for anyone to reach? Could it be that your ‘the one’ is staring right at you as you look around for him/her.

Are you willing to pass on love just because your imagination of perfect is misguided? Love is a choice, one that should be personal. If he/she loves you right, maybe your predetermined ‘perfect’ can benefit from a few changes.

Your friends should not cause you to pass on love because in the end it’s always about the two of you. That’s just how love is.

Next time you are going through your audits of who is right, try giving everyone an objective consideration. If you met every new person on their own right and not as a possible ‘The one’ maybe then you would get to know and maybe even love them.

At the end of the day if there is love, image is rendered nothing.

Email: pgathoni@gmail