I read somewhere a meme saying, 'I am a writer. Anything you say or do may be used in a story.' Hence I am starting with a disclaimer today; that this statement may not be 100 percent wrong. I meet many people with stories so touching that I would love the entire world to hear about them.
This lady I met at the bank while doing a few transactions shared with me her engagement story. It happened right in the middle of the pandemic, on her birthday. This young man could not wait for COVID-19 to clear to be with the love of his life. As soon as he proposed, she started anticipating the re-opening of travel so that her mom, who lived outside the country, could make it to the wedding. However, this seemed impossible, again- thanks to COVID-19.
If you had any reasons for travel during the most challenging time of the pandemic, you would understand how incredibly hard this was for the mother of the bride to travel.
As a girl, you wish that your mother would witness every exciting moment of your life. Therefore, it only makes sense that this young bride-to-be wanted hers to attend the most important day of her life. Little did she know (the bride-to-be) that there would soon be an unfortunate turn of events. Her dear mom passed on just a few months after the proposal, on November 3.
As grief operates, this incident sent her into a state of depression, despair, and hopelessness. She didn't want to have anything else to do with joy, including the wedding. For what reason? Mom is gone, so what is the point of being happy and celebrating something as beautiful as a wedding?
In good faith, she decided to return the ring to her fiancé and asked him to marry someone else with a heart in the right place for marriage. Someone who wasn't so broken for this world and one that would not carry the pain of loss into a new chapter of life. What a heart-wrenching act!
My heart broke into pieces when she reached this part because I could relate. When my sister and friend passed on, I was so worried about facing life again. She (my sister) was the first person I always counted on to pray for me if anything happened or be excited for me when I achieved the most miniature dream. She made life seem penetrable despite its challenges. So I related so much to this story that I had to catch myself before I started crying in the banking hall.
The beauty of this story is that her ‘mother-in-love’ (bless her heart) understood her state of mind and decided that she needed time to grieve and reflect. Long story short, her new family entirely accepted and understood her. She is now happily married to her prince charming!
Such stories warm my heart!!
Grief is an unexplainable state. It empties you and makes life seem hopeless. I still can't believe that some people allowed themselves to be stuck with my bad attitude and bitterness during this dark season after my sister's loss. Grief may do so many ugly things to a person, but in the end, it teaches us about gratitude!
Needless to say, grief has broken so many relationships, and one can only understand how this happens if they have gone through the grieving experience themselves. It changes us, makes us feel unloved, worthless, and misunderstood. It takes the grace of God (and perfect gentlemen) to stay in a loving relationship with the bereaved. I think God works overtime in our lives when we lose people because there is no other way to explain how we eventually come out of that dark cloud.
Are you in a relationship with someone going through loss or recently did? Do not give up. Love and smother them because maybe this could be the reason why you came into their life - to soothe their broken heart and lead them back into the light at the end of the tunnel.