Money, the deal breaker
Thursday, January 30, 2020

Today let us dissect borrowing and lending money; it is sickening to keep seeing strangers and acquaintances asking for money. This is where I put a disclaimer, I do not have a problem borrowing or lending money but it has to be done between two people that have a strong relationship and trust between them.

No matter how badly one is doing, it is wrong to assume that the stranger in front of you is in a position to help financially, regardless of how well dressed they are.

A few years ago I had a serious financial problem, so serious that even a salary advance could not help. I looked around my circle of friends and picked three that I could confide so deeply in. Two of them offered to help and from then on, if I was ever in a fix I went to them. I endeavored to keep my word and ensured a good track record, if I said the money would be in at the end of the month, there was no question about that.

Recently, I was part of a group that was organising an event and during that period of preparation, I interacted with the other members on the team, minutes would be shared and our numbers were on there.

A few months after the event was done, I got a call from a strange number; the person on the other end introduced herself and I instantly recalled who it was. After a few pleasantries she said she needed a favour, she was in a fix and needed a bail out, it was a huge amount of money; the kind you don’t just go around asking anyone.

By the time an acquaintance or stranger comes to you asking for money they could be having a bad record among their friends and colleagues, because you don’t jump the queue for no reason. In my humble opinion it is wrong, on all levels, to walk to someone you met just a few days back and say how you are in need of financial help. Who are the people you spend your time and money with? Those are the ones to help you at such a time because that person you are going to also has close friends that have been there for them before and expect him to someday come through for them.

Now as a lender, if you are going to give out your money it should be to someone you know will pay or an amount you can forego. Have you not seen friendships end because someone did not fulfill their promise?

A friend on social media called Rita told me how she helped a relative out and it has been months since the deadline passed, they are now at that stage where the borrower tells Rita she is nagging her over small monies. The next time you reach into your pocket to give out money be sure you’re ready to deal and live with the consequences of people that do not care about the hustle you go through to get it.