Today’s woman is probably the most empowered she has ever been.  In almost every realm, be it politics, civil society, religion or economics, she is making strides never seen before. 

The gender empowerment movement is stronger and more influential now than ever before.  Gender issues are being entrenched in constitutions, even in previously patriarchal ones in Africa! 

While the female gender has undergone many evolutions in society, one would think they should be as aggressive in their dating life as they are in other aspects of life. This issue is however a classical case where tradition clashes with modernity. Whereas more and more women are initiating relationships, some still seem to think it’s a man’s responsibility.

Men have traditionally had the upper hand in relationships, but this seems to be slowly changing. The leap years, which are the years that can be divided evenly by four, are surrounded by unusual amount of folklore, some of which puts to rest the tradition of men asking women for their hand in marriage.

The leap year is believed to provide an opportunity for the ladies to do the unthinkable; and that is to ask their mates to marry them. Many men are not impressed by women who initiate relationship because they term it as ‘unfeminine’. 

For some men, this is simply unimaginable. They believe women should sit back and wait to be pursued.

However there are aggressive women out there, those who call the shots in dating, but they are few and far between. Our socialisation, movies, and fairy tales have depicted true romance as the budding love between a helpless woman as a damsel in distress and her knight in shining armour that comes to her rescue.

The fact of the matter is many women today are not looking for a knight in shining armour. They are comfortable taking care of themselves, and may not even believe that knights even exist. Some women are taking over roles in relationships that were previously viewed as men.  They are making the first move, taking care of the bills, and taking charge of the relationship.

Despite the aggression displayed in other facets, some women still shy away from being the initiators in dating. They still seem to think it’s a man’s job. Some men deem this as a contradiction since it is the same women pushing for equality in other realms of life.

They seem to think that women have applied double standards when it comes to relationships. However there are women who still treasure the tradition that gives men and upper hand.  Many still look forward to being swept off their feet by the men of their dreams and living under the caring arms of their mates thereafter.

These women believe that’s how nature intended it. Some psychologists say that women who are very liberal have a higher divorce rate than conservative ones.

However there are liberal women who are loving wives and raising happy families. Relationships are more dynamic and have changed over time but what works for one cannot be replicated in another.

There are no hard and fast rules that say it’s inappropriate for the woman to take the man out, if that works for them. There are all kinds of ways that couples deal with this type of thing these days.

Communication in a relationship allows for the parties to express their expectations and needs in the relationship. Whether women decide to pursue their independence in relationships or not the fact remains that relationships are evolving and they are becoming more inclusive for both genders

Ends