The Counsellor's thoughts...

A responsible man with dignity cannot date two girls from the same family at the same time. This is a clear-cut red flag that your boyfriend is dishonest and chances are that he’ll keep disappointing you even more dreadfully in the future.

Thursday, July 20, 2017

Dear Charlotte

A responsible man with dignity cannot date two girls from the same family at the same time. This is a clear-cut red flag that your boyfriend is dishonest and chances are that he’ll keep disappointing you even more dreadfully in the future. Honesty in any relationship is indispensable and comes out of genuine love, trust, devotion and commitment to one partner and can be easily observed from the start. Remember, dating is a discovery phase for fact finding. It’s where you discover the reality that helps you to determine whether you should move to the marriage level, or whether you should abort the mission. This period should help you find out whether you connect ethically well with this man and have similar primary values. Your husband’s courageous act of dating the two of you, plus the chance that you are willing to turn a deaf ear to this deed, is eyebrow-raising and posses more questions than answers.

If you go in with your eyes and ears open, feet on the ground, and an awareness of the red flags, you will make the right decision. When your husband chooses to be romantically involved with your sister, you’ll be partly to blame because, you’re consciously competing with her for him.

She probably doesn’t care that you came first. Ultimately, enormous family conflicts are likely to be instigated by this saga.

Follow your gut, moral principles and ethical values. You will reduce your losses instead of continuing to invest blindly and, you’ll be relieved to have made your brilliant decision now rather than later when it’s difficult to undo the damage.Once a cheat always a cheat, you may think that you and your husband love each other greatly yet he’s crazy in love with your sister, or any other woman out there.

Don’t make a decision you may regret later, rather, use rational judgment to ascertain whether or not the relationship is for you. If you’re someone who enjoys dating an emotionally unavailable man who often gets carried away with illusionary relationships and multiple dating schemes, then you can move on with this boy or else, jump out of the game and let your sister try her luck. God bless you.