Why not? Dating is an adventure

Being single is the most fun time anyone can ever have and if you have an open mind; then you are up for one exciting and adventurous journey. Talking of adventure, what is more fun than going on a blind date?

When you ask someone if they can go on a blind date, the first reaction you are most likely going to get is a negative one. Many people view blind dates as creepy and yes, there are so many blind date stories that can make your skin crawl, but what experience out here doesn’t have the sweet and creepy part these days? What I am trying to say is that a blind date can indeed go wrong, but so can a date with someone so close.

So, would I go on a blind date? Absolutely. I love saying that this is 2016, because seriously, things have changed. Gone are the days when people used to go to church to find a ‘suitable’ partner. People have evolved and so have the ways people meet and choose who they want to be with.

If you can meet someone on a plane, a bus, at a concert, in a bar, what is wrong with a friend or colleague setting you up on a blind date? To me, a blind date is even better than these other areas that I have mentioned because at least, the person that you are going to meet is known to the person setting you up.

Kigali is such a small town, and if I thought that it was small, then social media has made it even smaller. As is the norm in a small town, there is enough gossip to last you a couple of months. Everybody seems to be an expert about the ‘details’ of your life, with some even knowing ‘breaking news’ about you that you, yourself don’t even know about. If I moved to a bigger city, I would even be happier to go on a blind date because it really would be cool to meet a stranger, start off on a clean slate where you are sure that he is not going to judge you from what he has heard about you but from what he is seeing in you or hearing from you?

Let’s just agree that some things are not meant for everyone. There are people who love trying out new things, who get a kick from navigating uncharted waters and are not into the ordinary story. Then there are the ordinary people who live by the book. One thing remains a fact though, obviously these two cannot agree on this subject.

editorial@newtimes.co.rw

No. My adventurous side has limits

Someone once asked me if I like surprises and when I said I didn’t, it’s like I had just confessed to kidnapping and selling a newborn baby. His reaction also came as a shock to me because not everybody likes surprises.

You are probably wondering what this has to do with a blind date. If you think going on a first date with someone you already met is awkward, imagine going on a date with someone you actually do not know. And that is why I’d rather be prepared than be set up for something I will never be able to erase from my mind.

I’m under the impression that people take dating seriously. You don’t just go on dates just because you can – who does that? Meet him, see something interesting in him and when he asks you out then say yes.

On a blind date, however, I’m literally meeting him for the first time. Since I’ve never seen the inside of an acting class, neither have I ever tried the art, I’m not sure I can keep my ‘panic’ intact should he turn out to be, for lack of a better word, funny. And by funny I’m not talking about Chris Rock ‘ha ha ha’ kind of funny – I’m talking about a guy with issues so potent that being single for the rest of my life has never sounded so good.

They say never judge a book by its cover, sure. I’d like to sit here and say I’m not a shallow person for considering looks, among other things - but I won’t because I’d be lying. He doesn’t have to look like a model fresh from a photo shoot at a beach in the Caribbean. But there’s got to be something I can work with, like a great smile or set of teeth, perhaps beautiful eyes or a nose that doesn’t take up too much space.

Also, when he speaks, what does he sound like? Does he sound like a dying cat? Does he fake an accent to seem more interesting only to sound like a retarded Irishman? On a blind date, I don’t think I’d be able to stomach the fact that he asked the waiter for ‘lice’ instead of ‘rice’. Or that he rudely placed the fork and knife aside and grabbed the drumstick with hands he didn’t even wash like there was no time to be civilized.

Sure, a blind date could blow Prince Charming my way but I’d rather take my chances with someone I’ve actually come into contact with. Fortune would have to smile real hard for someone to meet ‘the one’ on a blind date in just a try or two.

I find being ‘set up’ the ultimate show of desperation. Like ‘I’ve failed to find someone, can someone please hook me up’? If I can’t score a date naturally, then life is trying to tell me something.

There’s just too much pressure and too many expectations involved. I’d rather not put myself in that position.

rachel.garuka@newtimes.co.rw