High school: Who is responsible for the social madness?

High school is an example of a coerced pressure cooker environment. Adolescents are forced to interact on some level with dozens, or even hundreds of their so-called peers, persons they have little or nothing in common with; people with whom they are in constant antagonism for grades, influence and privileges.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015
Pupils in their leisure time. The 'cool kids' normally have a blast in school. They are envied by all and are imitated by the wannabes. (Internet)

High school is an example of a coerced pressure cooker environment. Adolescents are forced to interact on some level with dozens, or even hundreds of their so-called peers, persons they have little or nothing in common with; people with whom they are in constant antagonism for grades, influence and privileges. This leads to distorted social groupings and bizarre behavior on both an individual and a group. To some, it is a hub of stress, drama, tears and fears; to others, a journey to Disney world.

It is a blend of different traits- normal kids, cool kids, losers and ghosts. Labels (cool kids, rich girls, wannabes, tomboys, bookworms, geniuses, freaks, even weirdoes) are especially "important” when you are a teenager, and can be powerful enough to define an entire high school experience. Whether you are the drama queen or the president of the English club, adolescent popularity from hallways and classrooms, football fields or the locker-lined trenches of high school is a beckoning necessity- the experience is classic. In movies from "Sixteen Candles,”  "Ten Things I Hate about You” to "Prom,” social life is determined by where one sits in the cafeteria, who you walk with and who your girl/boyfriend is. This is ridiculous!

The cool kids normally have a blast in high school. They are envied by all and are imitated by the wannabes. Undeniably, popularity is seemingly more important in high school than anywhere else, yet it is not a measure of likability. It is composed of three elements: visibility, recognisability and influence. The people in school who have those three qualities are often that way because they conform to a standard. They usually have their share of drama and misery, but at least they look up to their clique for support and a sense of identity. The peculiarly simple-minded conceit that popularity is the key should not obscure your judgment. Console yourself all you want, but if you belong to this clique, you are just a copycat - a counterfeit version of other people. Who said you cannot be yourself and still be popular?

Meanwhile, the kids who cannot conform are always left out. They are virtually shadow-ghosts, the losers. They withdraw from interacting because they are afraid to be thought of as anything other than perfect. If you are in this category, do not feel left out. Not everyone is a social butterfly. If anything, there are a ton of jobs where working by yourself is fine, you could become a researcher, engineer, chemist, information technologist, etc. Besides, the lone-wolf thing is great for maintaining a skeptical and iconoclastic mindset. You are original - at least. Nevertheless, it does not hurt to reach out and make friends once in a while. No man is an island.

Then there are those I call the thorn -in -the -flesh. They always gain a certain infamy and respect because they’re tough and commit petty crimes. After high school, these guys either change their ways because the stakes for getting arrested get too high or they just end up becoming sketchy nobodies. To these I say, grow some moustache! Seriously, your inconsequential delinquencies do not prove you are tough- they prove you are stupid enough not to see how much of your youth you are putting to waste.

The worst of the groups is the socially awkward. The line is subtle between unpopularity and lunacy. This type runs with the nerd crowd and has absolutely no traction with the normal people whatsoever. They branch out socially. My advice: get a life!

Oh and when teachers join in the social madness, it is simply pathetic. The adults who are supposed to be modeling social behavior for students are in some cases openly forming their own cliques, with condescending acts that seek cheap popularity. Shamefully, the students are made aware of which teachers are allied with others. They hear teachers grumbling; they know when teachers are dating each other. Even worse, often the teachers are making associations and judgments and in some cases explicit descriptions about students based on their labels. You can’t expect students to know what appropriate social behavior is when the teachers aren’t following that model themselves.

The writer is an English Language Instructor