The heart-broken find solace in the church

Jane is 30 and had been with her husband since she was 23. She had some issues (panic disorder, depression being recently diagnosed with personality disorder). Lots of childhood issues!

Saturday, September 06, 2008
A wedding is every young man and womanu2019s dream. (File photo).

Jane is 30 and had been with her husband since she was 23. She had some issues (panic disorder, depression being recently diagnosed with personality disorder). Lots of childhood issues!

Her husband was her rock through their marriage although she had put him through some pretty bad crap. He knew her issues and he had always promised to never leave her, but to support her.

This gave her confidence to put all her faith and trust in him. Remember the whole truth is he was her rock to lean on. She adds that well, he got tired of everything leaving her two years months ago (after six years).

She just found out last weekend that he has another woman and he has changed a lot (meaning he had lost intimacy).

The search for Mr. Right was not a smooth road for Jane, which at times drives a number of young people to seek relief in churches for the healing of their broken hearts.

Jane defines disappointment as "the failure to attain one’s expectations.” She had expected a lot from him and within a blink of an eye he told her that it was over with her, a thing she failed to emotionally grasp.

"Now that he had left me, I searched every where among the family, friends and relatives but nothing only getting disappointment as I had become dependant on them 100percent, the only person who gave me acceptance is God, and when I worship God I feel this strength in me which gives me hope to live for tomorrow,” Jane narrates her story with tears flowing down her cheeks.

Occasionally people believe that the church can supply them with comfort for their earthly needs. Most persons of God attempt to help people in every way they can especially the needy during crisis and emergencies. But there are those people come to church pregnant with expectations to get future husbands or wives.

When I tried to dig deeper into why young people flock to church, at least 50 of those interviewed; from the different churches across the Kigali city revealed that they went to church in search of their future partners and others seeking relations for pastors to wed them when the time comes.

A few said: "I just found myself a born again Christian.” And another small portion revealed that church gives them comfort and hope for everything in life.

Another victim of circumstances intimated that: "I have been living a secular life and when I tried to get my religious leaders to help me out in having a religious marriage ceremony they gave me a number of conditions which got me to join the Pentecostal church which seemed to me more liberal.”

In another testimony, a woman says, she lived a secular life for some good years and when she found out that she was getting older after a series of failed relationships, her last option was to step into the house God. As she believed that the church is the only place in this world where you get acceptance and where you receive healing for a broken heart.

Some of the prominent reasons why a number of people endure such a heart-broken lives is rejection or abandonment, a second category of reasons include abuse, cruelty, and hurtful words with the last including loss of jobs.

The Church is an earthly refuge that can fend off worldly storms getting empowered when life seems impossible. Sociological studies show that broken and hurting people hurt others. People who have been hurt are often angry, bitter, resentful, or close themselves in. Huge barriers are erected in their lives to keep people away so they won’t get hurt again.

Studies also show that broken hearts cannot be stopped by modern technology; a hurt person also does not need heart surgery. Only Jesus can heal the heart-broken, the healer of both the physical part of humans, and the inward part of human of the spirit, heart, and emotions.

For those who have given up and surrendered to God, this is the best choice you have ever made in life as Isaiah 61:1-3 confirms that "Jesus was sent to heal the brokenhearted and to comfort all who mourn…to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning and the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness.

Meaning they receive a new life with hope and a better future.That they may be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified.

The broken hearted will have an encounter in the house of God which is described as church or body of Christ.

Contact: ntagu2005@yahoo.com