I am kicking myself for not having taken advantage of Valentine’s Day. 

This is not about ‘detoothing’ as some girls I know do, but rather cashing in on Valentine’s Day merchandise. I should have planned ahead and invested in cards, plastic flowers, hearts, chocolate and anything that symbolises this so-called lovers’ day. If I had done that, I’d be smiling all the way to the bank like those who stocked up the items.

Restaurants, hotels and nightclubs make a decent amount on Valentine’s Day and my sources tell me February 14 could soon overtake December 25 as more people not only go out but spend the night out too unlike on Christmas Day where almost everybody prefers to stay home with family. 

I think there’s some truth to that. I doubt that you’ll find many couples spending a night in a hotel on Christmas but it’s the norm on Valentine’s Day. It’s safe to say that guys generally foot the bill and many will tell you they wish they didn’t have to, especially because they are already paying the rent, airtime, wardrobe etc. 

Come Valentine’s Day, they still have to buy all these treats and pay for expensive meals which are nothing more than the usual chips, chicken, maybe pasta and drinks, only that many hoteliers decide to double or even triple the price! 

Almost every girl that I know has expectations and I’m sure you’ve heard a good account of break up stories the day after or on Valentine’s Day itself. 

If she doesn’t hear from you, you better have a good excuse my friend or it’s the end of the relationship. I have to say I feel sorry for men. I know a guy who blew his salary on just one date and I feel bad for him because I know he’s not even going to get the girl. There are about three other men chasing her and they have more money. 

He doesn’t stand a chance because she’s one of those girls who are in it to get as much as they can. But while I sympathise with the poor guy dropping his money down a deep hole, I can’t help thinking that men bring it upon themselves. If I knew a girl was out of my league, I would steer clear, especially if the competition is stiff. Instead, Iwould spend my money on shoes, a home theatre or whatever else you guys are into. But then again, men like contests. They’ll fight to death over anything, even women who really don’t care about them. I’m told it has something to do with pride.

Of course I know many men who’ve won the battle thanks to the size of their wallet, but I also know others who married the girl only for her to run off with the shamba boy. So, at the end of the day, money doesn’t guarantee a happy ending.

I wish all those men who’ve had to borrow or steal to finance their Friday rendezvous knew that! Like my workmate Claude who had to borrow money from a female colleague to take his girl out. What are the odds that the creditor received this cash from some other guy as an early Valentine’s Day present?

What I found amusing is that she asked Claude to pay back with interest in three weeks’ time. There’s a girl who knows how to make money. I think I should start up a loan facility for cash strapped guys.

I know I won’t have a problem getting clients because as long as there are women to impress, the male clients will keep coming. My palms are already itching.

To be continued...