Diaspoman: Increasing market share in 2014

As you may recall, two weeks ago, I managed to convince my new boss, that I could double his revenues if he allowed me to explore new opportunities in Bujumbura. 

Saturday, January 04, 2014

As you may recall, two weeks ago, I managed to convince my new boss, that I could double his revenues if he allowed me to explore new opportunities in Bujumbura. 

I told him that I could increase his market share by venturing across the border. He reluctantly agreed and gave me small quid for a bus fare and accommodation in a cheap Burundian hotel.

You may also recall that, the bus driver and fellow passengers became impatient and left me in Butare town as I was placing a fake call to my friend in Buja. I was telling Claude that I had been delayed at the Jomo Kenyatta International Airport! The truth of the matter is that I was in Butare en-route to the Akanyaru border.

Anyhow, I somehow made it to the Akanyaru border post and I joined the passenger queue at immigration. Needless to mention that I was dripping wet like a fish. I was shivering sick. I could not help noticing my fellow passengers murmuring and giggling amongst themselves. I could not imagine how my fellow passengers would ridicule me to such an extent. Did they not know that I was on the verge of exporting IT services within the region?

Anyways, I decided to let bygones be bygones. We later on boarded the bus and drove off to Bujumbura. By the time we approached Kamenge, my clothes had dried. I was really looking forward to my Bujumbura visit where hopefully, I would emerge out much richer.

When the bus finally arrived in Bujumbura, I disembarked and quickly got myself a new SIM card. My first call was to Claude. "Hey brother, we finally made it from Nairobi. It was a hectic flight my man. I’ll see you later, this is my Bujumbura number.”

Things were on course indeed. I quickly checked into the hotel. I immediately ordered for a drink! The bottle was ice cold and the beer flowed out majestically. I leaned backwards and started to enjoy the goodness of Kira dodora land. I unpacked my belongings which included a manual on Microsoft excel and a flash disk.

Unlike many other internationally recognized consultants, I did not carry a laptop. The simple reason for this is that no sane person in Kigali would have risked lending his or her laptop to Diaspoman. 

Deep in their hearts, they figured that Diaspoman would vanish across the Lake Tanganyika along with their expensive laptop. That is why I decided to just borrow a flash disk from Aggrey and hope that my prospective clients would take me seriously. 

At 7pm, Claude cruised over in his posh BMW. We hugged and exchanged great memories. Our next stop, according to Claude would be at the Havana night club. "This is the hot spot in Buja” Claude exclaimed. Wow, I was already feeling great and looking forward to a super night at the heart of Bujumbura. We jumped into Claude’s BMW as he drove me around for a mini Buja tour. I could sense that this would be one of the most memorable ways of ending the year! I look forward to coming back and reporting to my new boss that I am on the verge of increasing market share for his company! I only hope that I can achieve this as I get down to boogie on the Havana dance floor!

Happy 2014!