…think using social media is a career change. We all have that friend we know quite well but because they are on Facebook or twitter they think they can change into some kind of magical philosopher, problem solver, poet, motivational speaker all in one.

I am talking about the ones who are always posting inspirational quotes and such kind of things that are meant to fool the world into thinking that all is well in their lives and they are actually the next Oprahs of this world with wise counsel on almost everything you can think of. Funny enough, offline they are still the same problem-laden, confused and broke fellows you have known all along.   

…spoil a good moment just because of their greed. For a moment the whole world was glued to their screens learning and celebrating the life of Nelson Mandela only for some power greedy jokers in South Sudan to decide that this is the time to make use of their guns. All of sudden we are back to the stereotypical African story of conflicts and suffering.

Didn’t these guys just get their independence like yesterday? Are they not the same folks who have been trying to join the East African Community, how on earth did they think that killing each other over power was a good plan at this time when people are getting ready for Christmas? 

…keep talking about how technology marks the end of the world. I still do not understand why it is hard for people who have nothing to say to just stay quiet. I am really sick and tired of these so called religious jokers who spend time convincing people how advanced technological developments are a sign that the world is going to come to an end.

Instead of spewing such garbage why do you just find yourself a cave and live there by yourself surviving on hunting and fruit gathering. People with this kind of thinking do not deserve to be allowed to get close to a microphone. 

…like to rub it in on how they are now on holiday. Let me first state clearly that I love my job and always enjoy that moment when the pay cheque comes in. This job of hating on people who make our lives miserable is a full time one with no known breaks or holidays. That said, allow me to hate on people who make the rest of us who do not get Christmas holidays feel bad.

I am talking about the ones you send an email and the only response you get back is "I am away for my annual leave from December 13 to January 13. For any information contact Mr. X for assistance.” Oh I hate these corporate snobs. 

…spend all their savings in the name of enjoying Christmas. I have said this before but some of the jokers either do not listen or they do not read this column. May be they are just illiterate and we are dealing with a bigger problem than we had earlier assumed.

Someone needs to help me tell these people that this Christmas business is an annual occurrence and need not be the time to spend every last penny and then become a problem to some of us at the beginning of the year when you can barely remember which bank notes are in circulation.

After all is said and done, Jesus did not die for this kind of foolishness. 

Let me help you hate by sending your suggestions to thehater2009@gmail.com or text me at +250 788 545293