Have you ever found yourself saying, “I wish I could hold the tail of time, I wish I were given another chance, I wish I had never met him or her,” or “I wish we never had a fight”? If your answer is not affirmative I will not believe you.
There are many things we regret having done or having not done. The best thing is to seize opportunities and accept that we have made mistakes and rise to the occasion. I would rather regret about something I have done than what I haven’t.
At times we spend too much time beating ourselves up for our past failures and gazing at lost opportunities that we are unable to get back. We fail to note other opportunities that present themselves.
The truth is, regrets leave you somewhere, but it is up to you to choose whether they will drag you behind or push you forward. Regrets are part of life and if you accept life, then, you must accept regrets.
You should not let your past keep you from being happy and having enthusiasm for life. Here are some tips to help you handle regrets:-
Imagine if a 50-year-old who cannot forgive himself for cheating on his wife in his 30’s or, a PhD holder who still beats herself up for failing her Primary Leaving Exams (P.L.E). Every good thing starts with self-love and forgiveness. You should forgive yourself and anybody else who makes you regretful. Forgiving is a critical stage in healing in your life.
2.REDIRECT YOUR FOCUS
The past is gone and will never come back. You need to understand that when one chance fails another opens for you.
Do not waste time dwelling on missed prospects. Holding onto your past can be disastrous to your future. A wise man once said, “you are likely to see something better ahead but you cannot do so, if you are constantly looking behind.”
3.LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES
There is a lesson to be learnt in every mistake. Instead blaming yourself, ask yourself what good you can obtain from the mistake. It could be a blessing in disguise.
If the thought of what you did comes into your mind, say, “I forgive myself”.
This will help kill the anger inside you. If you hold yourself responsible for your own regrets, then avoid making the same choices in the future.
4.TALK IT OUT
Regrets are like a strong metallic hangman’s noose, like a highway to the grave. They can affect your mental health and also might cause slow death.
Talking to someone you trust helps. Don’t keep issues to yourself.
This helps you release pent-up feelings instead of bottling-up. When bad feelings are kept, they can burst out in embarrassing ways. Sharing your problems also helps others.
5.MAKE NEW GOALS
Once you direct your attention, spend time re-building your life and collect your broken pieces.
Set new achievable goals and have strategies that will help you realize them.
This will help keep your zeal in life alive. Stay committed and focused in carrying out your action plan to avoid any more failures.