Every time the word ego is mentioned, the first picture that comes to mind is a tall handsome man who has everything a man wants in life. Men always like people who strike their ego.
When a child is born, it is born without any knowledge any consciousness of its own. And when a child is born the first thing he becomes aware of is not himself; the first thing he becomes aware of is the other.
It is natural, because the eyes open outwards, the hands touch others, the ears listen to others, the tongue tastes food and the nose smells the outside. All these senses open outwards. So what is this whole issue about a man’s ego?
To me an ego is just an acquired phenomenon which reflects someone’s past or present. Sometimes some ego is good but others can get onto someone’s nerves. Some men think that by being rude and arrogant reflects some traits of him being macho.
Some ego comes due to some rather painful past. According to Sophia Nyamboki a man’s ego is equivalent to the hole and emptiness he harbors in his heart.
“I know this guy at work who behaves like he is larger than life, he seems to be living in a cocoon where his imagination leads him to believe he is king, and He walks and talks as if he is Gods gift to mankind after Jesus. But when I look at him closely he is just a small hurt little boy and I can’t stop to wonder what he is afraid of that makes him behave this way”
According to Nyamboki it’s not enough to just dismiss someone as arrogant just because they seem so sometimes they have underlying issues.
Nyamboki says “When I look at him I can’t be mad rather I feel sorry and sad for him, it must be hard being him, so no I can’t be mad at him when he doesn’t say hallo or when he walks around in an awkward bounce. I can only hope that people look at him and learn to love what is not pride but a weak ego.”
When I look at him I wonder what would make anyone feel big by making other small. If you have to bring people down in order to feel good then how far low are you?
I wonder what would propel a person to an extent of doing this. I see lack of self worth, I see self loathing in this people but mostly it is the emptiness that propels me to want to understand.
This is in no way an insult but it is just a way of helping you understand rather than be mad that some people dare to walk around as if they own the world.
Some of this people grew up in loneliness, they were made feel like nobodies and this is their way of showing the world that they don’t care. It’s a way of protecting themselves from vulnerabilities.
Some were abused or even locked out of their family homes and they must have felt really small and lost. They soon realized how to overcome this smallness with pride.
So what we should feel is sorry and hope that sometime they will be whole again. Because when they find their wholeness they will be able to look towards themselves in love and to appreciate that pride will get them nowhere.
An ego is a major display of what we lack and what we feel absent in us .So these people should not be outcasts they should be embraced in love because it is what they lack-love.
So next time you are encountered by an ego maniac an arrogant nerd look at him with understanding and hope that one day they will find that wholeness they greatly desire.
That the hole they seem to have will become shallower until it doesn’t exist anymore. Until they are comfortable in their skin. Until being themselves can no longer cause hurt but acceptance.
Then their obese ego will be replaced with fulfillment and peace and the world will be free of these ego maniacs we greatly dislike.