The travails of young love

I was in a car with an old friend, not that I know him well, he is just old. We were listening to the radio when a song came on. I asked “Is this The Drake?” He laughed his head off “No, you idiot, he’s just called Drake.” I must admit I stopped listening to the latest pop music around 10 years ago, but to get laughed at by a fifty year old was painful. “This one is featuring Lil’ Wayne, Rick Ross, and the southside ballers, and the sick boy.” He said with a contentment that matched my shock. “They are currently having beef with the Gangsta murda clik after they insulted them in a song. You have to know this, keep up.” Again more shock. What was happening? It turns out my fifty year old friend likes the company of ladies much younger than himself. Hence he gets to hear of the latest developments in the realm of gangsta rap. I feel sorry for boys in their late teens and early 20’s, they have to compete with men with much more money than them. If so many of their age-mates are dating men as old as 50 and more, who will they date? In a society where there is disparity in wealth you are more likely to have exploitation, sometimes it is the girls exploiting old men. You sometimes wonder who the victim is, is it the girl or the old man? We have a campaign called “sinigurishya!” we need one called “Sinkodeshwa” or “I am not for rent.” The girl gets a standard of lifestyle beyond what any man her age will give her, the old man gets to feel young again. Yet at a time when a girl should be discovering love with boys her own age that are going through similar experiences, they are instead the plaything of older men. So a girl doesn’t go through the emotional development needed to be a stable person, having jumped several generations. For the boys it is a curious situation where men lose their virginity later to girls who are younger, not the same age. They have to sit back and let the big bosses handle it and hope that one day they will have money and make up for lost youth. This goes back in our culture centuries, young men were away either herding cattle, in the army, or paying a debt of labour that older men married younger women. A key indicator of gender equality is when women marry later, and the age gap between the couples is equal. Yet young love still flourishes, young couples steal kisses while no one is looking, loving texts are swishing back and forth. However there comes a time when true love meets cold hard cash and true love doesn’t always win. “I’ve still got it, I have more women now than ever, they won’t let me sleep.” He smiled as T-pain came on the radio and he turned it up. My worst nightmare is not being alone, I can handle a lifetime of solitude. It is ending up like that, to have your sexual instincts govern every aspect of your life. To think you have a way with the ladies, when these particular ladies just love your money. Even worse is to know they love your money and still do it. Ramaisibo@yahoo.com