A real man cries too

It is always been said that men are the ‘stronger’ sex. They never cry but are always there to offer a shoulder for the ladies to cry on. Why is it so easy for women to cry yet very hard for men- is it because women are so emotional and the tears help them in releasing some of the emotion, or it is simply because men don’t have any feelings at all? I do not remember ever seeing a man break down in tears. That is why I wonder if they ever cry. As young children we grew up with a perspective that men don’t cry because every time he was on the verge of crying mother used to tell my young brother that men don’t cry. He would then stifle his tears as if it was no big deal in the first place. Few things would make a man cry, many usually break down while trying to get through a divorce because of the fear of staying all alone again; they get scared and cry for sometime but they later get used to the situation. When grandmother died I saw grandpa cry, I thought maybe because he had grown old. He however said he couldn’t imagine his life with his angel gone and yet there was no hope in seeing her again, it broke his heart. Thomas Rubaramira, a Pharmacist in town, says when he was young he would never cry even when he would skin his knee because he knew men don’t cry, and when he grew up he learnt to fight tears and became ‘the big boy’. “One fateful night I helplessly watched my son die. That’s when I realised that all talk about men not crying was a total lie. I cried and I still cry about it with no shame. I cannot play ‘the big boy’ any more,” says Rubaramira. Some men cannot play the ‘big boy game’. They openly without holding let emotion take its course because one cannot fight emotions all the time. While men would prefer throwing a chair at a wall to fight what they feel at heart, inside them it is burning fire but can’t be let out; at least not in public. When you see a man cry and he is not ashamed please reach out to him with your heart because his life has been torn apart. After all, real men do cry. Laura2jos@yahoo.com