HUMOUR : “When a Beggar Has a Choice”

It is not that I am trying to look down upon our less endowed members of society; the fact is that, society is divided into hierarchical levels that are arranged in a pyramid way. As you know, the majority lie at the bottom, with a handful in the middle and only a few at the top. If you do not feature anywhere here, then you are a “ghost” (you do notexist) period. The other day, I happened to go out for a bite, brochettes, this is delicacy manufactured from any flesh of chicken, fish, goat or even the cow or is it the bull! It is very funny how my body and that of my car end up working harmoniously; every time I think of taking some brochettes and a few beers, before I can even think, I find that the car has already taken me to Carwash a.k.a. Roasters. This place is great; it has great roasts of all kinds as well as many tribes of peoples and beers. One thing is for sure, this place was not intended for beggars of any form. Where would a beggar get the cool farangas to “waste” on drinks in a place like this? Far from the facts, some people wander and find themselves there accidentally, as if that is not bad enough, the genuine revellers find themselves paying for the unbudgeted for “guests”. A few days ago, to be precise, it was a Saturday evening; as we sat relaxing on our daily doses of different tribes of beers, an elderly gentleman walked up to our table and greeted us as if he knew some of us very well. That is not a problem, each one thought he knew or was a relative of the other. After the greetings, we ignored him, hoping that, his host would take care of him. Cutting the long story short, the elderly gentleman decided to introduce the purpose of his visit; not mincing his words, he informed us that, he was very hungry because he hadn’t had anything to eat for two days. In his own words, he wanted at least a bottle of Primus. My colleague (Gafaranga) could not take that lying down, “How on earth do you want beer when you are hungry?” He asked the fellow. It was eventually agreed that we instead buy the guy a meal instead of booze. Gafaranga called one of the waitresses and ordered for a plate full of “gatogo” (mélangé) for the elderly guy so that his hunger could be cured. Normally, the gatogo comprises a mixture of items e.g. bananas, irish potatoes, onions, tomatoes, offal etc. When the food was presented before the man, he demanded to know why they hadn’t brought him meat (read beef). He began grumbling that he cannot eat such food because it will make him sick, that could we buy him Primus instead of the food, if not, could we give him at least two thousand Rwandan francs so that he could buy himself the type of food he usually ate! There is an English adage that goes as follows “a beggar has no choice”. When a beggar has a choice, he ceases being a genuine beggar. Mfashumwana@fastmail.fm