RELATIONSHIPS : Public affairs ; a disillusionment !

It was a warm, interesting girl’s night out. It was as if we had waited for this forever. Having the best time than ever, we chatted about relationships, beauty, the best make-up on the block and fashion icons before getting to the very central topic ‘Love and Dating’ As we embraced the love topic, a girl friend’s ringing phone interrupted us. Though it continuously rung, she showed no interest in picking the call. She instead held the flashy mobile as high as she could for everyone to see the incoming caller. “I don’t love this bald head but he insists on calling me every 15 minutes, he is so disgusting,” she said. We did a lot of convincing to finally make her pick the now nagging call and guess how she responded! “Hey sweetie, I am sorry I missed your call, it was in the silent mode,” she sweetly said. The couple intimately talked for over two hours. They said they loved each other and made many promises. We were treated to amazement when our fair friend told us totally controversial things to what she was talking on the phone! Was she fooling us? Was she ashamed of the boyfriend? It’s a two way thing that lovers always humiliate their partners especially in public! Another boyfriend always addresses his girl with unpleasant nick names! At times he refers to her as fatso {extremely fat} or kiwi {shoe polish} because of her very dark complexion! Meanwhile, pylosophers refer to love as ‘blind’ in other words when people are in love, they view even the worst things as good! Does it mean that people who embarrass their lovers have fallen out of love? To a given percentage, lovers who ill talk about others in public don’t love them that much though there are many reasons for this behavior other than that. “Ill talking about a lover is a sign of not being contented with them,” says Robert Magezi. For the dudes, ill talking is a defense mechanism. Maybe there is something attractive about this girl but she is not their dream girl friend! This makes them ashamed of the mere idea that they are dating her! “We prefer going secret with some girls and if the worse happens we talk ill about them to maintain our image before friends,” say Gilbert Kalisa. Public embarrassment also works for the unfaithful lovers. They aim at making believe that they are in love with one guy/girl while the other is chasing after them. Meanwhile, a girl will embarrass her boyfriend all she wants just to make impressions that she is loved more! She will not pick his call to prove that he can’t sleep without talking to her. She will give him all sorts of nasty names to show how undeserving he is! And when it gets to extreme heights, she will explain the relationship as a financial based one. It’s such a betrayal for a lover to discuss about you. Some take it far to explaining how their lovers are poor in bed or how their families are broke! All that can remedy this situation before going out of hand is being real. “Do you truly love him, if not seek love somewhere else,” says Rita Mbabazi. And if you love someone because of financial and other reasons, keep all your comments to yourself. Embarrassing them only makes you appear naïve before everyone. You get embarrassed too if you continuously put your private life out there for the public to judge.Be real and date people you truly love. Ends