FICTION:This World is Crazy!

…I’ll teach you a lesson by God! This is an extraordinary real life account of an incident, which occurred some time back in one East African country. The story made such a ruckus that made the rounds of most gossip pages in the local tabloids. There was this man called Anthony, who had a very beautiful wife, Maria. The two had been married for nearly five years, but they still had not been blessed with a child. Anthony had a very good job as a long-haul truck-driver. He never complained, for his work afforded him all that he needed, and above all else, he was able to provide for the needs of his beautiful wife and always keep her happy. But then there came a day when things went very wrong, as it is always the case when things must to go wrong. Yozefu, one of Anthony’s best friends, thinking that he was doing him a favour, rather unwittingly disclosed to Anthony over a drink that his lovely wife Maria was having an affair with another man. To make the matter worse, the man Maria was supposed to be having an affair with, Petero, was also Anthony’s very good and closest friend. So, naturally, Anthony found the whole thing very difficult to believe, but the bitter seed of doubt had already been inexorably planted in his head. As days went by, Anthony became cantankerous, more and more miserable. Just the thought of Maria cheating on him with his best friend, became an intolerable pain, an obsession in his mind. Several times he skipped trips to deliver goods to neighbouring states; for fear that his absence would provide Maria and Petero the opportunity to get together. After about a month of this state of mind, Anthony was psychologically devastated. And this is when he decided to do something about it. First of all, he hired a private detective to investigate the carryings-on of his wife and Petero whenever Anthony was out of town, on his long distance travels. The reports of the detective after a month, concluded beyond doubt that Maria and Petero were lovers. Next, for two consecutive months, Anthony carried out his own investigations. Several times, he lied to his wife, each time telling her that he would travel out of the country for three days to one week, but then he would stay in a hotel room around town. This way, he was able to watch their movements under cover of his assumed absence. And finally, on the last day of the second month, Anthony had mastered the lovers’ diabolic plan of cheating him. The plan was very simple: As soon as Anthony left his house, usually at exactly 6.00 pm, having told his wife that he would be away for a week or two, Petero would without fail, arrive at his house by 9.00 pm sharp carrying a paper bag under his arm. By the number of empty bottles he had seen in the pantry, Anthony had already established that the paper bag contained a bottle of Champagne. He had never, himself, purchased the brand they enjoyed during their illegal dealings. Petero never left the house before midnight. Earlier on during his investigations, Anthony had formed the habit of visiting the Peteros more frequently than he had used to do before then. During these visits, he had come to notice that the relationship between Petero and his wife was not the best. At the same time, he had taken care to ingratiate himself with Petero’s equally stunning wife, Rebecca. He at times brought her small gifts such as perfume, which he gave her in the presence of her husband. There was nothing wrong with that, or so it seemed. After all their wives were also friends. But Anthony had his plans. On the last day of the second month of Anthony’s intense bitterness and misery, Karoli, yet another of Anthony’s closest friends, says that Anthony had sworn, silently, his mind seething with rage, that: “He’ll teach those two a lesson by God!” And this is how Anthony taught them the lesson. First of all, he told his wife that he was going away the next day, as he usually did - for just three days. Next day, after saying good-bye, he left the house but of course he had no intention of leaving town. Instead, at exactly 8.45 pm, he took a strategic position at the corner of the street where he could watch the main gate of his house. As soon as Petero showed up at exactly 9.00 pm, Petero raced to the latter’s house where she found Rebecca all alone, watching the television. “Hello Rebecca! Bad news, or rather good news” Anthony started. “I just met your husband on my way here. He says not to worry, but he got a telephone call that said he has to report to the office for an urgent meeting. Will not be back before midnight he says. And you know what? That bore of a wife of mine Maria is off to see her mother who’s ill. What do you say we have a drink together at my house?” You got it right reader; Rebecca who was already bored to death accepted the invitation. When the two got to his house, Anthony who had planned it all took Rebecca to the visitors’ room and told her to remain quiet while he checked whether really his wife had left. When Anthony knocked at master’s bedroom calling out her name, Maria’s head reeled with fear as he realized the worst. “Down, under the bed! She whispered at his lover. My husband is back.” When she came out already dressed, Anthony looked at her scornfully and harshly told her: “Out! At the petrol station! I want a gallon of petrol this minute.” Confused beyond reason, Maria rushed outside while Anthony rushed to the visitors’ room. He took Rebecca by the arm and took her to the master’s bedroom (his room), and on the bed where they started making frantic love. Before long Maria came back with the gallon of petrol, banging the door as she entered the house, and her shoes making a hell of noise in the parlour. “Quick!” Shouted Anthony to Rebecca! “Under the bed! My wife is back!” Ends