You may kiss the bride

So I recently started dating some cute and really classy girl (you have no idea just how much I’ve been boasting). I could easily say she is the full package. I make it a point to tell everyone that I will marry her and even describe how the wedding will be.

So I recently started dating some cute and really classy girl (you have no idea just how much I’ve been boasting). I could easily say she is the full package. I make it a point to tell everyone that I will marry her and even describe how the wedding will be.

Little did I know that my wedding would come much sooner than I had anticipated – and just one problem - with a different bride!

So, one Saturday morning I was at a friend’s home reading for a test due the following week. In African sandals, jeans and a t-shirt with some stupid words scribbled on, no one would take me seriously if they met me.

To my dismay, two muscled men came over. They asked me if I knew math because they needed help with calculations and would pay me. With my feather weight pocket, I couldn’t let this pass me by and even told the men how I am pursuing a degree in engineering.

I went with them and was shocked to find a small crowd of people seated at a well decorated venue. At first I thought it was a funeral but when I looked closer, everyone was dressed in a suit and I remembered that very few Rwandans wouldn’t waste money buying a new suit for a burial.

Quickly, the guys dressed me up and said, “Our young sister isn’t getting any younger. You have to marry her right now.” The suit didn’t fit at all; the sleeves were so long that they looked like wings. The shoes were a size up and the tie looked like a kite swinging from my neck!

I thought it was all a prank but it wasn’t until I saw the bride that I got the energy to run. She was muscled just like her brothers and when I saw her up close, the words ‘young sister’ seemed vague because she looked ten times older than them. Her arm was as big as my arms and both my thighs put together. She quickly grabbed me and said, “So you are the one going to give me engineer babies?”

She quickly pulled me to the pulpit and asked the priest, who was also forced there, to wed us.

When I heard ‘you may kiss the bride’ I suddenly woke up and realised with unimaginable joy that it was just a dream. In the morning, I was tempted to switch courses.

 

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