When big bottoms, origin determine who to date

MOST if not all women believe that when men are talking, most of their conversation rotates around sports and women. Well, there might be some truth in it.

MOST if not all women believe that when men are talking, most of their conversation rotates around sports and women. Well, there might be some truth in it.

So, as I finished working out in the gym with my friends, Jack (not real name) was covered in sweat and out of breath, but all it took to recuperate the entire group was for one to tell Jack that he was sweating and panting like a girl. The conversation went on making fun of each other and before I knew it, the conversation had turned into a topic of men’s likes and dislikes about women.

I started wondering why any time men come together, their talk always ends up about women. This time it started with Henry (not real name) telling Jack something about his girlfriend weighing 113kgs and carrying a lot of baggage. In the midst of the laughs, another Edwin (not real name) shouted, “I like big women.”

He continued to lecture them about how he has found that there is more body to a full-figured woman, “something to hold on to” is the way he put it. He was convinced that for some reason, a reason he couldn’t fully explain, and the more kgs a woman carries (to a certain extent), the more she knows how to take care of a man. We failed to understand his theory.

Babu (not real name) started to honor women from the south saying he was tired with babes from the North (we were in Uganda). Convinced that no woman across the Northern By-Pass could satisfy him, he was in search of a girl from the South. We wished him luck.

This prompted another Luke (not real name) to explain the merits of girls from the north. Back and forth they went: Southern women are too naive; Northern women are too tough. Southern women are too lazy; Northern women are too quarrelsome. Southern women are looking for a daddy; Northern women are looking for a sugar daddy. Southern women are not steady in relationships; Northern women don’t miss a free meal. Northern women are only interested in money; Southern women get married to money.

This was hilarious as I was getting tips on girls from different regions. They traded words for a good 30 minutes. These likes and dislikes, and ridiculous stereotypes, went on for nearly an hour. Weirdly enough, I have a friend who believes that women who tattoo and pierce their bodies have a high level of tolerance since they can tolerate pain for beauty purposes.

Well, they continued with one saying that he can’t date a girl with no watch because it showed she didn’t know how to keep time. Another said he wouldn’t date a woman with big feet because women with big feet liked giving men the boot. From leg hair to underarm hair from big bottoms to tiny tops, from skin complexion to education level, everyone had his preference, everyone except the Hilary (not real name) who has been married for some time that he had no idea what kind of woman he liked.

In the long run, we all decided that the definitive turn-on had nothing to do with a woman’s weight, geographic location, shoe size or anything else of such shallow nature. What a man is really looking for is a woman who simply treats him right. A man wants a woman who is open, sincere and kind and treats him with the same respect she expects to be treated with.

That’s a fact. Plain and simple. Although, I must haste to add that different men view being treated “right” differently. Some might want, and need, a leash and lots of pampering, while others might desire a woman who will respect their independent nature.

But in general, every man is in search of a woman who will support him, encourage him, and be there for him. Not a woman who will look for every chance to test his manhood, disparage and rebuke him, and tell him how he’s not a real man. My buddies, finally, concluded that most women are inexperienced about what it takes to be a real woman. It’s not just being born female. It’s not just about sex. It’s about being his woman.

By the time we reached our watering point to relax, I concluded one more thing: For every type of lady, there’s a man out there who has her on his list, and who takes every chance to specify her merits in an all-male setting when the conversation inevitably turns to talk about women.

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