The presumption that women survive on men’s money

The other day I was coming from work late in the evening and a friend had given me a ride. Somewhere near RDF headquarters, a taxi-moto guy overtook the car with a female passenger nicely dressed in a relatively short dress. The guy who was driving the car I was in immediately said the woman was...

Friday, May 17, 2019, 12:47 AM

Divorce and everything in between

One thing being decried by many in Kigali today; silently or loudly is the high divorce rates. Whether it’s a church, salon or massage parlour one can’t help but overhear a story about someone who has left the country after a nasty divorce or one who remarried a few weeks after their...

Friday, May 10, 2019, 12:00 AM

An umuganda experience

Last Saturday was Umuganda and I had been looking forward to it. When I said I had participated in Umuganda a few times before, none was in my current village, so on Saturday I decided to debut. I underestimated what this meant to the community and my chairman. He was so happy to see me; a few...

Friday, May 3, 2019, 12:00 AM

To cheat or not to cheat; choices have consequences

A lady had been faithful to her marriage and respectful of the vows she made to stick with her husband in all conditions. Their six year union had been blessed with two children.  Along the way, whenever she would join her husband and his friends in the absence of their wives it would...

Friday, April 26, 2019, 12:42 AM

Balancing relationships and work

From time immemorial whenever someone has a chance to interview or interact with a career woman who seems to have her life in order, one question is always asked, how do you balance work and family? This is mainly in reference to husband and children. I did a simple survey on different social...

Thursday, April 18, 2019, 7:47 PM

When ‘pastoral’ lanes get mixed up

‘Wow, dear sister Bwana Yesu Asifiwe’ ‘Amen asifiwe sana.’  ‘How are you and our parents?’ ‘I am doing great. The parents and the entire family are well. Thanks for asking. How are Martha and Jonathan?’ ‘Martha and Jonathan are well....

Friday, April 5, 2019, 2:23 AM

That ‘tired’ but favourite undergarment

Girlfriend, have you ever sat on a moto then wondered what people would see underneath your skirt if you fell badly with your legs lifted up? How about that bra strap; are there times when you have to keep pushing it back because you know it’s a ghastly sight? Many women are stunning,...

Thursday, March 28, 2019, 8:42 PM

Fear a man with a loose tongue

A longtime ago, gossip was associated with women; groups would be seen doing ‘high five’ as they walked to the water stream, meetings were for catching up on who had bought a new dress or whose husband had abandoned her. Lo and behold, things changed, these days you’ll get more...

Thursday, March 21, 2019, 9:46 PM

Put that gadget away for a moment

This week, an old friend came to mind for one distinctive character; he was never enslaved to his phone or any form of technology. Gabriel would never carry his phone to any appointment or house visits. I recall the first time he came to our home, and towards the end as he was departing, I...

Friday, March 15, 2019, 12:00 AM

How would you live if you were given a second chance?

I have an aunt who has been ailing for almost a year now. I could not believe my eyes when I first saw her lying on the ground. The once bubbly, chubby and fiery aunty Hellen was a shadow of her former self. She struggled to lift her upper body in order to give me a hug; meanwhile I struggled to...

Friday, March 8, 2019, 12:29 AM

Forgive and be forgiven

Patrick was raised by a single mum owing to his parents parting ways only seven years after his birth. The mother did all she could to take her child through school. Along the way, there came a man who won her heart over and from this union, Patrick got three other siblings. Unfortunately this...

Friday, March 1, 2019, 12:36 AM

Butterflies caused by family gatherings

This week is ending well for me though it has been one of those where my stomach was filled with butterflies. I have two ‘married’ brothers. Married is in quotes because for an older brother, we did a traditional ceremony when their first born child was six years. The second one...

Friday, February 22, 2019, 2:58 AM

Laugh out loud (LOL)

One does not need money to laugh, it is what I was telling a guy early this week. I did an interview years ago and the editor chose to give that story the title ‘I laugh even about things that are not funny.’ In everything we talked about with the reporter who interviewed me, that...

Friday, February 15, 2019, 12:09 AM

A hero of a parent

For years whenever Heroes Day is celebrated, I hear people celebrate their mothers, mainly for giving birth to them. Not one to be easily hoodwinked, I look beyond; there must be something a parent has done to warrant them being called a hero besides the act of giving birth. Last Friday we...

Thursday, February 7, 2019, 11:13 PM

The things we post on the internet

There are things that people do without consideration of the consequences it would have on their future careers or relationships. I once requested a girlfriend of mine to pull down a Facebook post she had directed at her boss. I’m sure we all know people who have had ruthless bosses but in...

Friday, February 1, 2019, 12:00 AM

Leave a relationship with dignity

I recently sat down with an old friend and did some catching up. Of everything we shared that afternoon, the one that stood out was leaving a relationship with dignity. Any relationship, but I will focus on one that could or should lead to a marriage. Do you know anyone who lived in an informal...

Friday, January 25, 2019, 12:00 AM

If only there was a way

The last few days have seen #MuteRKelly trend on various social media circles.  As a result, I found myself tagged in a few tweets expressing disappointment in the fact that the radio station I work for was still playing R. Kelly’s music. I did not respond because I was in no position to...

Thursday, January 17, 2019, 10:59 PM

The R. Kelly in our midst

The story of R&B singer R. Kelly’s life and love has been told for many years. I have watched videos and read articles of women accusing him and journalists being castigated for exposing him. In response, R. Kelly has sang songs claiming that he is being witch hunted because he is a...

Thursday, January 10, 2019, 7:23 PM

Earn all you want but pay yourself first

Last week I got a number of comments in response to my article on New Year financial blues, with several people asking cynically which pastor had paid me to advocate for tithing. While I believe that the discipline that goes with tithing did the trick for me, I am not ignorant of the fact that...

Thursday, January 3, 2019, 10:19 PM

New year financial blues

For many of us, Christmas time is both exciting and challenging. As the year comes to an end, amidst all the celebrations, there are people that are wondering how they will survive come January. Some are celebrating while figuring out where they’ll borrow money to get them through the (...

Thursday, December 27, 2018, 10:26 PM

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