Her life as a prostitute is now a distant memory. Looking back, she says unfortunate circumstances drove her into that line of work, trading sex at any price as long as it meant helping her and her children survive. Now 45 years old, Ernestine Mabondo is a mother of four, and says that after separating with the father of her children, she had no means of survival whatsoever, forcing her to offer her body for money. When she joined Hands of Mothers, a non-government organisation that transforms lives of sex workers, her life took a turn for the better. Through different forms of empowerment and training, she managed to escape her prior lifestyle. Umwali (L) and a beneficiary during a training session about numeracy, business management and saving. “I am now a cleaner, I work with different households and this is how I earn a living. My children are all in school. Their father had a change of heart and reconnected with us, he pays school fees for three of them, and with the fourth one, the organisation has promised to start paying fees starting next year,” she says. “My children are healthy, I am optimistic that they have a bright future ahead, especially now that they are now getting an education,” she says. She is grateful for the way the organisation does all it can to see them become better people. “They help us in many ways; when we meet as a group, we are so happy, they talk to us and they treat us like their own. When we fall sick, they help us find treatment; they pay for us medical insurance and our families as well,” she says. Mabondo also says that they formed a cooperative that helps them save money, but they are also hoping to do more, such as, take on training in tailoring and plaiting to be self-reliant. A group photo of some of the girls from the education initiative Most of these women being helped by the organisation are sex workers, some of whom are doing their best to transform, however, some are still finding it hard to leave their old habits, and this remains a challenge. Take 33-year-old Delfine Niyomubyeyi, for example. Regardless of being a part of this organisation, she says she is finding it hard to stop operating as a sex worker. “I didn’t choose this life. I have so many questions. I always wonder how I will live. I sell my body so that I find what to eat but I don’t want this, at times I want to repent to God and reform but I don’t, for I know that even when I do this, I won’t fail to respond to a call with someone offering me money for my services. I want to survive and I choose this because this is the life I know,” she narrates. “At times I wish I had like an older sibling or at least a father and mother, or one of them, but not be like this. These are the questions I always have, but when I fail to get an answer, it really becomes hard for me. I get depressed, I feel unworthy, like living is not important,” she adds. Niyomubyeyi grew up as an orphan; she doesn’t know any of her relatives. She says she has grown up on streets and in bars where she offers her body in exchange for any means of survival. She sent her two kids away to live with their fathers because she didn’t want them to have the same life she lived. Financial group debate during a training session. Regardless of this challenge, Niyomubyeyi thanks the organisation for doing its best to take care of them and their families. “They help us in our daily lives, they help us access treatment, they bring us together and there is a difference in our lives.” More ways of empowerment Yvonne Umwali, programme manager with the organisation, says challenge remains in convincing the women to quit prostitution. “We counsel and encourage the women to leave prostitution. Some do, others don’t, and some say they are transformed when in real sense they aren’t.” Umwali says that some slide back to old habits when they are in urgent need of money. “But our main target is to see that they completely transform, this is why we empower them economically, because most of them say they went into prostitution because of poverty, yet they have to feed their kids,” she says. As a way of offering more help, the organisation started paying school fees for the beneficiaries’ children as a way of lessening the women’s responsibility. “We did this in hope that if we lessen their financial responsibility the women will find it easy to resist going back to prostitution,” she reveals. A girl from the organisation’s education initiative receives her school supplies that include sanitary pads and a backpack. Through the organisation, women access training on financial literacy, counselling services and different forms of empowerment. This is done through the different dialogues held every week. When they meet, they are given space to discuss ways they can improve their lives. “Most of these women are the sole bread winners of their homes, but so far, we can see that this is changing their lives. They tell us how their lives are better now that their children are going to school, among other things.” The organisation pays fees for over 150 children and also provides school requirements. “For the girls, we also give them sanitary pads because we know that this is also one of the challenges girls face when it comes to accessing education. We want these children to have a different life from that of their mothers, we don’t want them to be exposed to the kind of life and work their mothers do,” Umwali says. Through the organisation’s micro-lending component, women access loans for small businesses. So far, the organisation operates in Kigali but they plan on extending to other provinces. Hands of Mothers started operating in Rwanda in 2011 with a purpose of helping vulnerable women out of poverty. The organisation is working with over 200 women, and most of them are HIV positive. How can reformed sex workers be empowered? They should be accepted and given support as they embark on reforming. They could also be taught other skills that would help them earn a living. Find out what they are passionate about and offer them training. After that, if they can be given employment in the fields they have trained in, even better, otherwise they will miss their former job. Jackie Lumbasi, Radio Presenter There needs to be accessible and free training that will equip these women with the necessary skills. And for those who haven’t changed, there is need for platforms where reformed sex workers can testify and encourage others to beat the habit. Barbara Burabyo, Photographer Women need to access employment opportunities because most of them join such because of poverty. But also for such vices to stop, just like the government sets targets for development, it should encourage citizens to do the same and be held accountable, for example, on a yearly basis. Adrien Biziyaremye, Student What they need are opportunities; women need to be educated such that they get the knowledge and skills to get jobs, or better yet, create their own jobs. Yves Ujeneza, Businessman editor@newtimesrwanda.com
