Editor, RE: “Would you take on your spouse’s name?” (The New Times, February 4). Rwandans, especially young ones, should know that taking a husband’s name after marriage is a practice we copied from Western countries. Yet, even in the West, there are some exceptions. For instance, in Quebec, Canada, the practice became illegal in 1981 to ensure men and women had equal and exercised free choice in the matrimonial union. In Africa, educated Africans were quick to adopt the practice as they always wanted to portray themselves as “abasilimu” or “abazungu”. Haven’t you ever heard people saying that so and so is a muzungu as a way of saying that she or he is developed, advanced, or modern or behaving like Westerners? In rural Africa, Rwanda inclusive, most women do not change their last name to their husband’s name after marriage. As usual, it is the so-called elite, knowledgeable, middle-class who will continue killing our culture in the name of emancipation or becoming “les évolués”. Adopting a husband’s name is wrong and unnecessary as it renders the woman man’s property. Those women who think that adopting their husband’s name is showing commitment to their man should ask themselves why such a commitment has to come from women only. Both we and our parents belong to God – and not to our spouses. In Rwanda, more and more women are adopting their husbands’ names upon marriage and our women-dominated Parliament does not seem to be bothered. No surprise though – given that Rwandan women like to sacrifice themselves for others. Our women parliamentarians must be busy tackling other national issues, such as issues concerning children and men, but forgetting their own, if not themselves. I hope they will wake up one day and address the issue. Seth **************************** What’s wrong with copying a culture from the West that is harmless but instead strengthens relationship? I personally have no grudge with a lady to be called my name though my mom never adopted my father’s name. And, I think it’s equally cool for me to use my wife’s name. John **************************** What kind of research have you done before stating that a woman taking her husband’s name is in accordance with Rwandan culture? Tell me one single Queen who took her husband’s name, or any significant woman in Rwanda’s long history for that matter. This copying of Western customs has to stop. Rwanda has been independent for 50 years now, but truly our minds are still colonised. Our women have beautiful Kinyarwanda names but, if this trend continues, there will soon be no more female names in Rwanda. All women will be called by either their husbands or fathers’ name. I worry about our culture. Gilo
