Out of sight and soon out of mind?

Based on personal experience long distance relationships are challenging and difficult to say the least. To be honest, I liked the guy, he was fun but as a husband he would have been disastrous. This is probably why it was easy for me to let go of the relationship just months after he left to go clog his brain with more knowledge.

Based on personal experience long distance relationships are challenging and difficult to say the least. To be honest, I liked the guy, he was fun but as a husband he would have been disastrous. This is probably why it was easy for me to let go of the relationship just months after he left to go clog his brain with more knowledge.

We sent each other a couple of emails and spoke on the phone probably twice. And that was it. The coolest thing is that it took us about six months to realise that the relationship had in fact ended – if the non-existent communication was anything to go by. We handled it like adults and agreed that it was for the best – I guess he never saw me as marriage material either!

I admit that I missed him probably the first month or so, but after that, I went weeks without giving him a thought. As a matter of fact, it’s almost like he had never existed. I know that doesn’t sound right but like I said, I never saw us as the ‘forever’ type – we were more like the ‘live-in-the-moment’ type. Long story short, it was definitely for the best and we are now very good friends.

I ask myself sometimes, would I have made an effort to commit to the relationship if I actually loved him enough to want to be with him forever? I chose to give it a try, with the constant curiosity if it was the right decision to make and if it even stood a chance. It was the first long distance relationship I had ever been in and I suspect it was my last too. 

However, the truth is, long distance relationships have just as much a chance of succeeding as any other relationship. Sure, we have to consider that long distance relationships take away your ability to see each other on a frequent note, as well as the choice of being intimate whenever you desire, not to mention that there is major trust required.

So before taking on this adventure sit down and agree on what your expectations are in the relationship and how much of a commitment you are willing to give and receive. If the two of you decide to be monogamous, then it is clear that neither of you will be dating anyone else as long as your romantic relationship exists.

If you don’t think your libido can survive a long distance relationship then the only way you can fix that is by agreeing to see other people. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not advocating for promiscuity here. I’m simply saying that instead of lying to each other that you will be faithful, put it in bold letters that once you go out and have a few tequila shots, there is a chance you will take the bartender home. It beats lying.

Being clear about what you both want is extremely important, especially in a long distance relationship, in order to prevent future misunderstandings and mistakes.  Bear in mind that without trust, the relationship is a colossal waste of time, so any sneaky suspicions of your partner’s inability to keep his member in his pants will only generate even more suspicion when he is miles away.

Don’t just jump into it; you should know even before you do it, if you are the long distance relationship type or not – that will save you both a lot!

 

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