My son is tagging along his mother

My son is now five but he always wants to tag along the mother. I would think that by now he should be exercising some level of independence not wanting to depend on the mother all the time. How do I go about training him to be independent minded?

My son is now five but he always wants to tag along the mother. I would think that by now he should be exercising some level of independence not wanting to depend on the mother all the time. How do I go about training him to be independent minded? 

Timothy
, Gikondo

Dear Timothy,

Thank you for sharing your concern with other readers. Indeed this is a common problem and I am sure many would like to learn about the ways in which it can best be addressed. In today’s competitive world, children need to learn how to be independent as soon as possible.

Although 3 to 5 year-olds may still need parental help, parenting experts also agree that children can physically do more than many of us think. There are different strategies you can use to change your child’s orientation towards independence starting with expecting more from them. Stop always giving the excuse that they are young.

You can also help your child more by resisting from doing for him anything that you think he can do by himself. The more he finds himself in control the more he will work hard on it. Just give him the chance. For example you can always ask him, “Do you want me to help you or you can do it yourself?” Children always prefer to do things themselves after hearing that statement.

Other things you can do include not redoing what he has already done as this may discourage him. Let him solve simple tasks and often reward him for doing a chore. The goal here is to make him feel like someone capable and contributing to the family. With time your son will literally be the ‘boss’

Send your parenting questions to education@newtimes.co.rw

 

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