Just a few decades since the first cell phone found its way to this land, we act like they are fundamental parts of our bodies. Our hearts can’t beat without them and blood can’t circulate either. Our dependence on these little gadgets is getting stronger. Every good thing comes with a con or two.
Most people living in the city have parents in the village. They used to mark their calendars to go and visit once or twice a month, but now with phones, it takes just a RWF 500 airtime card to check on them.
When it comes to dating we mistakenly think that cellphones are the best invention ever! We can chat, text and call our partners anytime. Well, that is an accurate description if only we could learn to use them the way they should be used.
Imagine asking a girl out on a date and you are all super excited. Over the phone you choose the best venue for a romantic dinner. Being the gentleman that you are you arrive on time and wait for her. Your heart skips a beat when you spot her walking towards you. She gives you a peck on the cheek then immediately receives a call.
You pull the chair for her and she nods in appreciation. She is still chattering away. The waiter looks at you and silently goes, “Dude, are you going to just sit there?” Well, although you are boiling mad, the best you can do is glance at your watch only to realize she has been on the phone for over 25 minutes.
She then absent-mindedly browses through then menu with little interest. By the time she hangs up, you have already made up your mind on just how far you want the relationship to go. She flashes a killer smile and apologies but in the middle of the apology comes another call. “She won’t pick it,” you hope silently. The waiter is now irritated, rolling his eyes every time he changes his standing position.
If the first date goes like that, a man would be a hero to ask for another. Mobile phones damage personal relationships even just by their presence.
They have negative effects on closeness, connection, and conversation quality, the presence of a mobile phone may lead you to think of other people and events outside your immediate social context. In doing so, they divert attention away from a presently occurring interpersonal experience to focus on a multitude of other concerns and interests.
Trust me, buying or owning a mobile phone is not enough, we need to learn when to use them or put them away, lest we lose more important things.