The dating probation period

Aren’t fresh relationships fun? Don’t you just love it when your phone’s battery threatens to protest because it is tired of all the calls, texts, and social media chats coming from your new found ‘pudding’?
Rachel Garuka
Rachel Garuka

Aren’t fresh relationships fun? Don’t you just love it when your phone’s battery threatens to protest because it is tired of all the calls, texts, and social media chats coming from your new found ‘pudding’? How cute is it when you can’t stop smiling every time his name pops up in your love struck mind?

I’d like to know however, where does this ‘excitement’ go after dating a while?  For instance, at first, his habit of finishing your sentences seemed endearing… but now, you find yourself more irritated than charmed.

During the first month of elongated phone calls and romantic dinner dates, you were able to overlook the fact that he has no curiosity about your history or interests. But now that a couple of months have passed, it has finally hit you that it’s time to make a decision to either move forward by ignoring the irritations — or cut your losses and move on.

Sometimes, we are forced to ignore what we perceive annoying at the start of a new romance because we happen to like other things about that person and want to give the relationship a shot. We know it is something we don’t like or simply can’t tolerate from day one but are willing to strike a compromise – for love’s sake at least!

But after dating a while, that constant reminder of just how much you hate some of the things he does keeps ringing in your head like a bewitched bell. Before, it was cute that he wore trainers with suit pants but now, you really wish he would buy a decent pair of shoes. No more can you stand the fact that he tugs at his member as if all the lice in the world set up permanent abode there– something you exceedingly hoped would stop with time.

But often, the issues that divide a new couple run much deeper than these surface level annoyances. According to yahoo.match.com, many relationships end at this point because it’s a critical window for people to open up to one another and truly express themselves. In other words, you might be frustrated that after weeks of dating, he seems even stranger than ever!

Still with the website, going out and meeting people is akin to sending out your resume. Going on a couple of dates is like the interview. The early stages of a relationship are comparable to an internship.

The first months are usually the time when people let out more information about themselves to see how well they fit with another – and this information ranges from beliefs, values, past relationships, friends, hobbies, life goals, and other things.

One slight argument could bring the liaison to an abrupt end but more often, deteriorating interest by one or both parties pretty much sums it up. I know some women do not give up that easily and tend to make it a matter of life and death but never be so desperate as to try and force it. I can assure you, you WILL regret it.

No matter how strong your mutual attraction might be, if you want different things in life, there’s bound to be a lot of clash ahead in your relationship. Will you compromise on your part and follow your partner’s dreams or is your love for yourself too strong to put anybody’s dreams ahead of yours?

Assessing these issues at an earlier stage will help you make better decisions for your future. In a month or so, you won’t feel so great if you broke off things today, but in a year, you might just feel it is the best thing you ever did.

 

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